Going it MYself.

Today i'm on off. In lieu of National Day. But fair, i spend National Day at work - its still considered work - and i get to spend the feast of the Assumption of Mary at home. Fair trade, cos i'm quite glad for this welcome break.

Break not only from work, but stressful "play". Just took in the time today at home. Therapeutic. And tmr i'm ready to go upshift again! Yay! Back to my favourite Island! Wahaha..

Refreshed. Feeling Educated, Knowledgeable.

Managed to practise Javascript today; made a script to help timetable planning. The cook always gives a positive review. So i think it was a fantastic script. And i think it shows much promise to better life down at the Office.

Which makes me think. USMS (suggestions to the improvement of workers condition) at the office. There's an obligation to send in 8 per year. I hvnt had any. And now i know why.

I saw the bathroom at bunk didnt hv place to hang clothes; i bought those stick-on hooks for hanging clothes.
I saw it was troublesome to plan a shift forecast, i did the JS script to do it for those involved.

And all this in 1.5 months here.

I should be excused from USMS. I'm independent. Not that i'm too arrogant to ask for help. More that i don't like to trouble other people with something that i think i CAN do myself. Its just that as yet, i don't see any problem around the office that cannot be handled by itself. As long as the superiors give space to implement our own changes, there's no need for obligatory USMS. It just encourages dependence.

And the irony is that the ones that are too big to handle, e.g. Washing Machine on Pawai? or probably too big to handle for them, even.

Latest USMS - don't hv enough variety of vegetables brought up/ no fruits.

Freak. I really don't think of USMS. I'm more enthusiastic about learning a bit about agriculture. Vegetables can be freaking grown, for crying out loud.

---

On a brighter note, i hv no idea where last week's inspiration to write what some call a poem (which i dont see rhyming) came from. But it felt nice to let go of my Mathematical Nature and embrace a different nature. If i were more Mathematical at point of writing that perhaps it would hv sounded more like "she's perfect because she matches every single one of my criteria". which is not nearly half as romantic.

---

On an even more brighter note (yes i threw grammar out of the window along with my pink IC) i am going up to PAWAI again! yay! or have i already mentioned that?

Anw, its a weekend shift so i'm "trapped" for this weekend. Though tmr is my 5th and "provisional" shift - after tmr, if all goes well, i can stay out and finally tap into the full use of my time.

Maybe Driving? or Badminton? or Tuition to keep my mind active. So many choices..

But now, Church!!!!!!!!! Really YAYYY! waahahahaha!

OUT! =P

For Her.

My mum asked me, What do you like Most about her?

And i thought.

I KNEW i liked everything about her.

But what do i like MOST about her?

Is it her enchanting eyes, which first captured my vision?
Is it her beautiful dimpled cheeks, which first enticed me nearer?
Is it her melodious voice, which first caused my heart to sing?
Is it her lovely face, which first told me how lucky i am?

OR is it her honest, pure and loving heart that never fails to love everyone around her, and especially me?

I think its the fact that in fullfilling all the criteria above, I believe that God loves me so much to send her to me. And i'll be forever thankful to Him for that, no matter what He has in store for me.

Happy Anniversary My Darling...

A Thought Too Farrr

Move over Sungei Buloh.. These are REAL mangroves. Ones that have survived bullet-fire... High tide actually, the sea recedes abt 50m during low tide..

Paradise off an offshore island off the south coast of Singapore.

The heavens show their rage on the innocents down below walking along the long jetty into the open sea.. The heavens are beautiful even in anger...

---

Those are a few pictures of MY island (note the possesive element involved in saying that). Even though its far from being MY island. Far, due to an ORD date (which IS welcomed, don't worry) and a rank far below Major General (a major-general's pay is DEFINITELY most welcomed).. Civil Servants in High Places in Singapore get a lot of money.. quite surely more than other countries around us where (if) corruption is abound. More even when the total sum of earnings is considered..

(Roger Federer Beat Rafael Nadal in Wimbledon final)

Food for thought, its said. But its also said don't think too much.

---

I was thinking about smthg i once read in a blog. 2nd degree friend, in friendster terminology. The Hund's Rule concept applicable on SBS/TIBS/CSS etc. Every Singaporean (especially those who hv gone out as a couple, hetero or otherwise) would know how Singaporeans tend to follow the Hund's Rule when choosing seats on a bus..

(Roger Federer Beat Rafael Nadal in Wimbledon Final)

Note, i'm not sure as to whether i'm quoting the right rule here, its been some time since i last studied that quantum thingies.. correct me if i'm mistaken please. n show me the little thing called Evidence! muahaha.. okay i'm officialy looney!! lalala..

I'll come back to that later.. (looney-ness)

Anw, i personally find it irritating when i see one person especially on the MRT sitting in the middle of a threesome of seats. i.e. _____ (IDIOT) _____.

So i find it pretty amusing when i saw a white couple (father and little daughter) decide to educate one of the pple out there.. i.e. Father (IDIOT) Daughter.

and not hesitate to talk to one another over the (now-no-more-an-idiot)... good work. now, another 4,499,991 to go. I think i took note of my friends (who AREN't antisocial idiots..) muahhaha..

thats the word - antisocial. we tend to need that rhineland-like territory to protect us from all the other ugly and rude singaporeans. so funny wahahaha again cough cough..

---

Looney-ness - its a wonder. wonder how people survive 2 yrs of NSF life. glad i don't have to go thru it (only 1yr10mth wahahaha lame). but seriously, they shld conduct a study: brainscans wld be necessary so see WHICH part of army life shrinks your brain... BMT? SISPEC (wld explain a lot *evil grin*)? or the sheer dullness of Fatigue work (aka SaiKang).

(Roger Federer Beat Rafael Nadal in Wimbledon Final)

The word Almost-Sgt Raja used was "erode". which is apt. He did use the word Brainscan too.. bah..

Randomly i think i'm going to change my blogskin. boooorrrreeeeddd of it. need mi photoshop though.. urf..

and here's another few pictures..

The most Lau Jiao on the Island. Been there 9 yrs. Even longer than DB-legend A. Tan. His name is Nicky alias The Veteran alias The Legend.

And this is Nicole aka Retarded Bitch. not being vulgar. just honest. and its her fault if this blog takes time to load because her picture is so big in megabyte size for some absurd reason which i dont know nor care to know. ahh heck..

---

So listen boys and girls.. or rather just you boys out there.. when you do your NS in a couple of years time, and are rolling in the mud, doing SOC or being forced to drink tooth-paste water from your helmet, or even getting service pay, think of me. think of the time you chanced upon my blog. muahahahaha. think. (i sound like a mad scientist.. muahahaha)

(Roger Federer Beat Rafael Nadal in Wimbledon Final)

oh yes. it'll be appreciated if u girls could offhandedly remind your brothers whenever they get exceptionally irritating. yes..

But i'm humane. i'll tell u the secret to my 'success'..

"Arse Luck".

Out.

oh yes. and my brother wants to remind you guys that Roger Federer beat Rafael Nadal in Wimbledon Final.

Out for real.

Island History

Yay i'm so happy. Uni term is starting!

But wait. its starting without me, dammit..

oh well, i guess i hv to maximise my time spent in pawai trying to learn stuff eg. cooking, gardening, cleaning.. yawn, usual army stuff. and i realised that actually, pawai is the name of a city in india.. hope not a namesake.. it'll be quite interesting to go research one of the lesser-known islands of singapore..

there are plenty of stories eg. ancient civilisations that used to be greater than rome and an army more vicious than the mongols are there to be found/formed. and there are plenty of ancient ruins to base our claims/stories upon.

i didnt take a hike thru pawai yet, they say its 500m long.. tiny, yes.. haha..

any case i hv pics of my friends on pawai, but i hv to make sure i dont include any equipment.

hmm wonder if the tv and the monopoly set is considered among them...

---

Can't upload pics for some reason.. maybe i try later..

for now, ciao.. so busy i am.

yes, while i'm super free during work hours esp whence in pawai, i'm super busy in the rare occasion that i'm home.. though it seems that my days tend to clear up when pple cancel. hai complicated.

and ya, i'm blogging less...

out.

Tsunami Proof

I seem to hv lost the blogging impetus since joining RSAF. gradually been sapped out of me. in any case, i am forced to the upkeep of this blog for the purpose of maintaining non-hokkienised conversation.

I'm clueless as to whether hokkienism is a misnomer. there's so many dialects indistinguishable from each other in that language that i tend to be smothered in. well with the exception of the last shift - mukun can't (or at least not well) speak chinese, kong doesnt, and my fave niko doesnt.

niko is a dog, mind you. 5 month old black dog. i'm ignorant and blissfully ignorant at that regarding the 'breed' of the dog. breed? its a foreign word. Black dog. enough description. bit ugly. but adorable. hence cute, in the literal meaning.

I'd hv gotten wonderful pictures of the wonderful island i reside on for certain periods - i even brought my camera.. but as testament to my idiocy i didnt charge the batteries. but i brought my camera. good enough lah. in the words of tauhid, idea was there.

and while i was happily sitting on that peaceful rock south of the "rock" that is Singapore, an island south of Singapore, Java, was hit by two earthquakes. in relative proximity to indonesia, we are. the second quake actually caused a tidal rise of about a foot - and consider the fact that i had left the jetty minutes before the tidal rise to watch my spongebob.

two guys (kong n mukun) remained on the jetty to see the sea engulf it. (actually the wave water jus managed to cover the jetty, but i tend to exaggerate). me being 40+m (i think) above sea level happily watching an animated sponge and his good friend the starfish didnt feel a thing. but later i got glad for those 200+ steps we hv to climb - it makes the place a very safe place during global warming. or a tsunami, which probably wld be the more imminent threat.

But in any case its such a relief to be back home after 3 days on the island. even if i keep considering it a chalet resort etc. correction, anw - its a chalet resort with area cleaning. tutz..

ok gonna rest. ciao.

out.

World Cup Pneumonia

So concluded the World Cup Germany 2006 last night (early this morning, Singapore time) as Italy won the competition for the 4th time, once more amidst an issue of corruption back home. I shan't comment on Corruption in Italy lest his Excellency the Italian Ambassador posts a comment like he did in "Today" newspaper regarding a commentary about corruption in his country. I'd agree that its unfair to judge a nation by its football players.. but there's no absolving the players involved in their elaborate attempts to soil the nature of the game.

And so concludes probably a World Cup that really i could have won a LOT of money - there was a certain pattern; every team i wanted to win either played horrendously (England) or lost. Quite sad, really.. Except for a handful of matches such as Czech Republic v. USA. And public enemy no.1 (for ousting Aussieland) eventually claimed the trophy. So i could hv won a lot of money..

In any case i believe that the most interesting talking point of the game was inevitably Zinedine Zidane's 3rd extraordinary header in 2 World Cup Finals. For those who are blur, the first two won the Jules Rimet trophy for France in 1998 v. Brasil. The third, this time well placed to the chest of an Italian player, got him sent off.. For those of you who missed the action..

Followed by the Italian's (obviously) must-make-the-ref-notice reaction..

We have it all on camera film - the whole sequence - but i'm lazy to upload it. Anw, Zidane got sent off in extra time, and France went on to deservedly lose. For if Italy did knock out the valiant Aussies and the Deutschlanders, it was evident that they wanted the Jules Rimet trophy much more than the Frenchies. Perhaps bcos half the Frenchie team HAVE already lifted it before, in 1998.

And full applause to the Italian defense, and clinical though sporadic attack.

---

Anw, i watched the final on Pawai, and hence was knocked out clean the rest of today. and it was a good first shift, where i definitely had to do more than my fair share, which of course did piss me off abit.. but apart from that, its okay la. its fun to change generators and do ops checks with the Radio. That's why i'm a signaller.

And 90% of the conversation and 80% of the TV shows and 50% of the radio shows were in Chinese. which, especially the conversation bit, really got on my nerves. technically it feels that i was excluded in all sense of the word for a lot of the time, and i'd have bonded with the sea better. and it was a disappointing day this morning - being poured down by the clouds' tears. and the sky's breath. The wind was blistering cold, and the weather.. still can't recover.

But apart from that.. the nice long nap, the end of world cup, the return home from pawai, the changing into dry clothes, the nice long chat with keira, and especially keira knighley on TV two days in a row.. Enough things to be thankful of. and enough space to still wonder about one of the great mysteries of the FIFA World Cup.

Out.

to You.

I'm back, and so sorry to dampen the spirits of those who believe that there should be more productive things online with the amount of money blogger is spending on me. But i'll just sigh and carry on with my exciting life that nobody will understand.

Maybe it adds to the excitement of hoping for an exciting post everytime u happen to chance upon this site. and perhaps you'd hv been terribly disappointed unless u were a terrorist searching for where the hell the RSAF conducts live firing exercises. Which even then i don't think you'd want to know anyway.

Anw i believe i'll be uncontactible over the next few days - i'm going over to the island. where its rumoured to have a monopoly set, mahjong set, risk set and others.. true, but read the fine print. nobody wants to play. bishk!

its almost as bad as giving u a hell lot of money and no time to use it. i.e. OCS. hurhur. whatever.

anw it never fails to amaze me how skillfull experienced cabbies are at their profession. did you KNOW that they have a computer map on their little screen?? soo cool.. did you KNOW that one day before the diesel prices skyrocketted i wanted to be a cabbie? oh wait. it was before it became known to me that a cabbie's job is the most lethal job (survey done in NYC). even surpassing the more obvious job of soldier. hmmm..

i guess gang member doesn't count.

or race car driver.

whatever.

Anw i think the computer map is probably a waste of money for experienced cabbies. and an insult to their abilities. they don't need it. it'll probably be better used to let their sons see where AMK ave 10 is. My fake address is there, btw. complete with a block number...

I'm gg back to what i used to be - a book worm. i guess those who know me wld probably question that statement, but rest assured, i was an avid reader before. besides, u'd probably hv only known me earliest sec1, which is 6 yrs after i read my last book regularly. strangely, sec1 happens to also be 6 yrs after i kicked my first football. coincidence?

On another note, i did try to convert to "Notepad". disaster, i think.. too personal. too hateful, too cynical of this crazy world we live in. i like myself in this civic-controlled environment that is blogger. u'd like me here better too..

i hate you, world. u're cruel and selfish. why do i seek to please u? why? - 010706

I still wonder. Why?

out.

Swansong?

I'm sorry that i've bored the living hell out of most pple that read my blog. Thank you naf for making that known to me - though i probably always knew.

It also makes me understand just how boring my life must be to an outsider. but seriously, rest assured - my life is not boring to me. so needn't pity the fact that i'm living a life that might seem extremely boring to you.

Which makes me think. a lot of pple's lives are completely boring to others. at least to me. which makes me wonder what purpose a blog serves. what's the difference between a blog and "Notepad"?

Out.

Extension

I still don't understand what ISN'T fascinating about seeing F-16's taking off when i look out of my window. and roaming around in a control tower. or walking across the runway etc. No matter what u guys say, i still think i've got the most fascinating job of them all. i mean.. its such a fascinating job that one of the sergeants has actually considered (and suggested to the relevant authorities) extending his ORD date. yes. EXTENDING.

of course, i reacted as most pple wld - "insane!" i yelled. this reaction is a result of BMT. but then i considered.. its not a bad idea. good job, relaxing enough, peaceful on islands, and, well.. decent pay. plus we don't hv to go outside to look for a job to occupy us while we wait for NUS.

Probably that last paragraph - last two, infact - has probably got some of ur jaws to drop. especially if ur a guy. girls jus dont get ns. and fighter jets. and etc. but thats a fact of life. was reading smthg by neil humphreys abt NSmen. smthg so true, abt how i tired my sister and brother and whoever was watching Black Hawk Down with my meagre knowledge of M-16s. (which i'll gladly announce that i hvnt seen in AGES).

Now i hv to do some research abt F-16 fighter jets and F-5 fighter jets. how to differentiate them. and its so troublesome cos i cant bring any "bytes" into the army computer. no idea why. why i can't bring bytes FROM my com, i understand. but INTO the com? viruses? hmmm...

I mistakenly went down to play soccer. attempt to at least. i decided i'm not gg to try out for the FSS team. need to buy boots. geez. unless i bring my first (and only) pair of boots. which are ancient. and by ancient i mean older than me. think how old that is in footballboots-years..

So excited abt tmr. why? i shan't say. not here at least. hurhur. okay i feel dirty. gg to bathe for the next hour or so. exaggeration no doubt. okay. ciao

out.

Beret

I realised that i definitely would not be able to rmb all the significant events of the past week, seeing as how many significant events occur during the course of one week in the RSAF. yes i'm so proud to say those four letters. even though i'm still like the smallest thing (private) that could ever don the RSAF No.3 uniform (which i'm so happy to announce that i was issued today). i will take a photo in that No.3 Uniform and paste it up here one day, but not now, cos i left the uniform in camp.

Which brings me to my next point, or rather, probably ur next question - "What the hell am i doing at home?". Its a good question. They give me night's out, and i choose to come all the way back home, foregoing the free dinner laid out so graciously at the cookhouse. crazy? nah.. my mom laid out a wonderful free dinner for me at home too. so voila i'm here visiting my home; and having to start making my way back to TAB at 2145. respectable 3 hrs back at home - computer, guitar, tuition room.. etc..

Anw, i digress. i was on the subject of uniforms, and i'm so glad to say that i've achieved my objective in the army. explanation: in BMT, i decided that my goal in the army would be to...

GET A BERET!!!

Wooo i'm so happy i got a beret! And after struggling to put it on for the rest of the day (after 1500hrs) i finally came to this. (see above picture).

Well, they say the Beret needs seasoning, so well. and the colour.. don't ask me, i also don't know. it says greyish blue, but it looks more like greenish blue-ish grey. either way the colour is cool. goes well with anything. yep. unlike the mismatched red or overmatched green.

Anw, another significant event was that yet again i've evaded IPPT test. make no mistake, IPPT is what i dislike most abt army. cos IPPT is a test where we actually hv to work. grrr... work and stress about passing simultaneously. ohh i so wish i pass it. albeit a month-long hiatus from physical training.. oh well. back to camp now then.. sleepy~

out.

The Sadist

I nvr thought it'll ever come to this. but;

HURRAY! SCHOOL STARTS TMR!!!

okay i'm being a terrible sadist, but reason being this is the first time this day doesnt affect me whatsoever. and i didnt even realise the significance of today as the last day of the pseudo freedom for school kids around singapore till i perused blogs of some of them school kids. i.e. my sister. and suddenly it hit me.

that being said, i still hv to book in tmr morning early at 7.45 am; probably will make my way to TAB say, ten hours earlier. to make way for time to get lost in the maze of roads there. actually there's only one long deserted road there. bit scary. it may not exactly cut through the cemeteries of Lim Chu Kang, but goes thru the equally scary zone of army and police camps. look left, look right, you would see the keat hong, police academy and other camps. and every time i pass the police academy i just suddenly rmb the show of a couple of decades ago (Geez.. i'm so old) called Police Academy. and thinking of all the weirdos inside the show Police Academy and realise that Chua Chu Kang Rd's very own police academy is probably likewise dominated by that sort.

---

and i miss pulau kawai again. i mean pawai. i wonder what "pawai" means in malay.. one day i'll make a note to check up on it. i wonder if would they call pawai an island in western countries ? i mean, its tiny.

and singapore has this unnatural habit of naming things bigger than they really are. i mean, MOUNT Faber is not even a hill, let alone a mountain. and here i was growing up believing that this great ridge that we have is comparable to Mt Everest and co.

that being said, i suddenly rmb that Alcatraz, which i believe to be similar in size to pawai -maybe Alcatraz is a bit smaller - is called a Rock more than its called an Island. and London is still called a city even though its way bigger than Singapore the Country.

maybe its because we asians are smaller than our western counterparts. which would explain why no asian team is in the second round of the FIFA world cup. unless u count the socceroos from down under. who AREN'T asian. though they're beginning to believe they are. (next time out they want to join the Asian group of qualifiers).

Anw, since they're our closest neighbours (yes, tts the sorry state) i'll support the socceroos. yay! good for them. maybe one more round before the real big guns start to take over. i.e. the Brasil's and the Deutschlanders. And yay harry kewell and yay Liverpool.

After all the exercise of the past few days, i'm just very glad of this welcome rest. and one more week in camp; hopefully its a fruitful one.

And i'd better give a very overdue wish to all.

Happy Holidays!!

Yes.

I'm such a sadist.

out.

Pawaii Kawaii

I think i should really not blog abt everything i want to blog about. its getting stressful when everything starts to pile up; and if i really were to release all that i want to say on this blog it would be a really really long entry that none of you would be able to finish. on the other hand, shld i issue a challenge?

anw this dilemma of long entries is a result of the fact that i've been super busy the past few days. plus there was smthg last time that i wanted to say. abt the fox and the sour grapes. which i really believe that pple dont give enough credit to the wise old fox for being able to think rationally to remain happy. i mean, so he can't get the grapes. then he reasons to himself perhaps there's a reason for him not to get the grapes. a bigger reason than himself. so basically why do we say "fox and sour grapes" in such a negative tone? the fox is wise.. wise enough to see the "bigger reason in life" that many of us fail to see..

so don't use the phrase in a negative sense. capisce? haha.. okaaay..

in any case today was the RCC (Regina Coeli Choir) concert. the peeris-influence on the RCC is relatively high - jackie n jon esp.. and it has what every S'goon district choir has to have - a nerva ambassador [my choir has TWO nerva's.. think abt it]. anw RCC has 3 peeris's, even more than any one SFX choir - 7am has 2 (including me); 9am has 2. then again, 9am has gomez's as well.. but well.. bit further in the relations line. anw the concert was great.. and i think that what i saw is the face of catholicism in the future - esp with all the youth groups springing up, even in SFX church - the cell-group phenomenon, aided by a strong music ministry. its quite exciting to live on this verge of smthg so new and exciting; we seem to be following the footsteps of our Christian brethren, and i believe definitely its a good thing. oh well.

i wonder how gd a peeris-choir wld be. definitely we'll leech on our more accomplished cousins. haha.. i'm glad to be from such a musical family; though sometimes i wish i wasnt because its really hard to be anybody other than a miniscule pawn - i always get the feeling that the age gap of 7 yrs between me and jackie is to blame for the fact that i believe that i'm still quite small (young) there. and it won't change. plus i believe anthony will experience the same thing. oh well..

---

yesterday was pawai maintenance day - we had to go there to pluck grass from the courts. in case anybody doesnt noe, i'll repeat myself. again. my platoon (flight) is in charge of pulau pawai which is a live firing area for the RSAF. i'll include a picture from google earth; i hope it isn't "wrong" in any way.

Anw, its quite cool, seriously.. i wont give a zoom in picture of my island, but its the middle one. and if u see properly, u can see my little bungalow-resort-chalet on top of a hill with 200+ long steps up. hai.. thats the onli problem with the place, with the exception of the overwhelming population of mozzies.

But seriously i'm so glad of this "vocation". not because its a slack non-physically-challenging vocation, but because there's a certain romance of the sea which captivates me. i always thought it was smthg that everybody shared, but in a short survey (i asked one other person) i realised that isnt true. in any case, its true for me; and the fact that i look around my bungalow-resort-chalet and i can see the sea on all sides; and the fact that i see the sun rise and set over the sea jus adds to that wonderful feelign of anticipation i hv abt gg to the island. that island, i mean..

i suddenly rmbed some show abt "gg to the island". the show is "the island" i beleive. and its so different.

Anw, lets hope the island doesnt let me down.

gtg.. ciao~ out.

F.S.S. - T.A.B.

I'll make this short since my time on the computer is limited by sleepy time (tmr bookin time is 0800hrs) and sis-off-the-com time (exceptionally late, as usual).

~*~

Anw, to those who don't already know, i've finally spent a day at tengah air base, which is really in the tengah (middle) of nowhere. So exciting.. seriously. and so officially i'm not in the Army anymore, even though i'm in that no.4 uniform (green sh*t).

To those who want to know my schedule as to know when i'm free or if i hv weekends off etc:

My job in the army is to maintain an offshore island used for (R)SAF training purposes (i'm still not used to putting the 'R' in front of the SAF). ANw, so i'm basically there 4 days at a time, taking either a weekday shift or a weekend shift. weekday shift is mon-thurs; weekend shift is thurs-mon. if i'm not on shift, i'll follow a regular working week. with the exception for the fact that i may hv off days here and there due to the fact that i hv to work on an offshore island. Seriously, the security on Tengah Air Base, henceforth referred to as TAB, is quite scary - they even had a x-ray lehh!!

i very scared sekali i say smthg i not supposed to say.. but i doubt i'd even be told anything of that sort.

Due to time restraints, only what i need to say has been said. actually i wanted to make a heartfelt dedication to my former platoon, but i'll do that next time - they deserve it. As well as a complaint at the overuse and misuse of the phrase "fox and the sour grapes". I really dont understand why pple seem to think that the fox was wrong to do what he did.. anw, more next time. gtg already. must sleep!

G'nite.

Out.

Happy Fathers' Day

How fast this day has passed - after coming back from church (special mass for deb's church camp) and i looked at my wonderful watch and it was already 5.30pm.. where the heck did my day go? then i rmbed...

I was attempting to stay up late last night. then i changed my mind - i began attempting to stay up. but at 4am this morning i realised the magnitude of the task i set myself, and fell asleep without much trouble. and so naturally i woke up at 1145 and had breakfast at 1200, went to chruch at 1330, had lunch at 1500, watched abit of tv before looking at my watch at 1730. oh well..

i hv to go back to camp tonight, probably my last night there - oso the last night i'd be seeing my platoon; and i believe that they warrant a fine entry here @UVLight.com. some day lah.. haha..

i can feel smthg different abt me this afternoon - church camp mass.. suddenly alot of memories came flooding back to me.. my own church camp, when i found my way back to God and the Church. and i remembered smthg that i told myself ages ago (5 yrs ago).. The reading was about the Transfiguration, about the apostles who saw the Transfiguration (the full revealing of the divinity of Christ) and how those same apostles hid in their upper room for fear of men after the Crucifixion from lack of faith. they saw it with their own eyes, they felt it with their own hearts, yet they didnt believe anw..

i couldnt believe i'd ever doubt the existence and love of God. and here i was five years later, doing just that - not doubting His existence.. but moreso his Love. and i'm very glad that i went for this church camp mass that brought me back in time to my pre-confirmation days. even had this fleeting thought that the pure white cassock looked good on Fr Gerrard. and wondering if i'd ever look as good in it..

then i held myself back and told myself i'm jumping too fast.

Anw the best i can do for now is be a good person and be caring towards everyone. even those i dont like. its hard, but i'd better get to do it.. i guess i'd feel loads better if i do that rather than what my previous entry suggested..

~*~

I would like to wish all fathers out there a happy Fathers' Day, as today is Fathers' Day. I wont dedicate anything on my blog to my Dad, cos i noe that he'll nvr see it anyway; he's not the internet savvy type. anw perhaps in some sorts this blog entry was dedicated to my Heavenly Father. And how appropriate is it that its Fathers' Day.

Utopia

I know i was tortured for 1.5hrs, standing (perfectly) still under the sweltering heat. well not really sweltering, but bad enough standing 1.5hrs in SBO and with a blinking scarf around the neck...

but the good news - its over! no more NDP.

Then i got some horrid (potentially) news.. tengah air base contingent is oso in NDP.. praying hard now..

And one more parade - supposedly a Change-Of-Command parade - but i'm jus going to take it as a thank-you parade to us, 20/05 platoon, who were ironically referred to as permstaff of SI by the emcee of the parade.. ironic considering the fact that immediately after the parade we'll be leaving that god-forsaken place. and all single-fingered salutes will be welcome.

so i came to this conclusion - we're parade veterans. i think the frequency of us (20/05) in parades is really one of the highest of all NSFs..

no, parade specialists. normal specialists hv their rank insignia on their sleeve; but ours is up our sleeves on our sunburnt skin. the national flag of red-and-white imprinted/tatooed on their forearms..

and i've fallen into a saddened state. again; typical of me on saturdays/fridays. for some reason. sundays, after church i'm pretty much rejuvenated and rearing to go, but its these saturdays and fridays. and i believe i talk too much. SAF shld consider reducing my security clearance. its not a matter of trust; its jus diplomacy. its my fundemental flaw, to be diplomatic and promote world peace, at least in the tiny little world around me.

i used to be relatively good at it. u hear what u need to hear. u don't hear what u shldn't hear. if u hear too much of what i hear, and u'll probably wage wars against others.

its this that's wrong in 20/05 even. there's so much bad-mouthing and talking-behind-backs that i can't stand it. maybe its the influence of fana and khairul against this; perhaps their fervour in putting it down, that i can't stand it. i'd jus be frank. frankness won't win u friends. maybe tactful frankness wld, but i'm still learning.

yes, i've changed. do i like it? not really, but i could learn to. quite fed up of this good-boy-nice-to-everyone image. only problem is whether i'll overcook it and become this evil-boy-nice-to-nobody. doubt so, but its a possibility.

but really, i wonder if there is such a world where everybody can live together without squabbling over differences. and then i answer myself - its so freaking impossible unless everybody has been zerorized (in signal terms, this refers to being reset to a blank slate). so theologically if heaven was this utopia of peace, we'd all have to be zerorized?

and yes i've had these images of the perfect world. and i'm not lying, or exaggerating when i say i saw no human beings, with their materialism and greed and suffering. again, i think i'm really beginning to sound like ms trunchbull and her "perfect school is one where there is no children", from matilda by roald dahl... oh well.. can't wait for church tmr.

out.

CzechMate

oh sorrows.. i can't believe that my holiday, so graciously given by the ISM, henceforth to be referred to as The Boss, has ended so early.

Anw, i'm still thrilled with the fact that the past few mornings i've been sleeping arnd 1-2 and waking up arnd 10-11. obviously watching the world cup. and i realised that while i've usually been an england supporter due to liverpool influence, my other team that i always tend to support is still arnd. and even better, i believe. as far as i'm concerned, the best team of euro 2004- the czech republic. and i hv adopted a new and atypical (among singaporeans) favourite.

All around pple support england. even those who can't stand conforming to the crowd tend to support holland. i guess to be a true non-conformist one must support a certain Togo or something.

But still, Czech Republic. nvm i think u can jus go read up on a world cup update on any of the thousands of blogs/websites all around bearing the same news, and often the same perspectives too. i shan't be the conformist that i tend to be and turn my blog into a hapless worldcup blog. tut tut tut..

Anw czech republic ground out the biggest win of this tournament, 3-0. definitely flowing football in all respects. beautiful, but too bad i didnt hv anybody awake to share my awe with. (it was the midnight game).

though again one can argue abt conformism being a paradox of itself.

~*~

Watched cars yesterday, and, unlike in x-men, i wasn't fool again to leave the cinema before the credits were over. and i was laughing n laughing during the credits and wondering why they hv to do this.. and then, of course.. they want to make pple watch the credits so pple wld see their names! but then, i think i'm wrong in that respect. surely it wldnt matter whether or not we see names or not - a name is just a name if we don't know the person. eg. we might hv heard of arthur ashe (a tennis arena is named after him) but i doubt many wld hv ever seen him play. i mean many of my generation (the BLOGeneration).

ah heck i'm gg to play my computer game again. and i missed breakfast today. so hungry.. grrr... oh well.. ta..

and i won't play minesweeper today.. because..


yes, i won.
out.

Premature Fare Well

i wld hv written this in present tense.. but the lag is a result of me being unable to use the com yesterday. and anw i had no reason to - world cup has started!

But its far cry from what its been made out to be. of the matches i watched, first match was a show of defensive haplessness (no exaggeration) and the second, a show of offensive haplessness.

But well.. its still the preliminary rounds and i can't care too much.

still all the world cup action can't take the attention away from NDP rehearsal. the penultimate one. (and i pray very hard that is true). there was perfect weather for parades - the Cat 1 thunderstorm arrived soon after us. and the sun indulged the clouds with all its extravagant glory, leaving us mere light. but alas, as a little one (ZhangQY) once said, perfection is imperfect so we can't hope for perfection. As perfect as the sky was for parade was as imperfect the ground was - soaked, and i wonder if highbury (the home of the gunners, where we had our previous parade rehearsals) or anfield would ever enjoy such pitch condition.

so everytime we go pom-pom; pom-pom; POM-POM-POM! and stamp(squish) our feets an inch into the sludge that we're marching in, the mud and water tends to splash up; sometimes up to 3 feet into the air. we might even expect parabola of mud-travel to pass over the head of a platoon mate (ZhangQY).

and if ur still scratching ur head over his logic of "perfection is imperfect", stop. u might eventually bleed to death.

~*~

Yes, if u've noticed, this is already like the second last week at stagmont camp (and in the army). soon i'll be off 7 bus stops further from home, in the abyss of singapore that is the west. and so i realise that while i tend to call everyplace i "stay" at, be it Marine Parade (VJC), Ang Mo Kio (AndSS), or plainly S'goon (HoMe), i've nvr even bothered to wonder if The West would ever reach that intimate relationship in my heart - it'll nvr be "home". It must be the homeliness of the army. and yes, that was sarcasm.

i've already been picturing an emotional farewell to stagmont camp with a single-fingered salute pointed straight at the heart of the place.

to no individual in particular, no worries; its to the general concept of the army. seeing how much time i waste in army i keep thinking if perhap it would be better if they work us a tad harder and release us a lot earlier. that way we do the same amt of work in total; but we're released to serve our country academically and financially earlier. see my logic?

But since they don't want to let us serve our country in more productive ways, i'll just enjoy my stay - i've already diminished the army's fabled lack of privacy; bunk 1.4 stands proudly in the corner of bunk 1; away from the chinese serials and meaningless (foreign to me) banter. Its my less sociable self in that bunk 1.4, quietly reading my book [by the way, i finished frederick forsyth's ICON - super cool] or attempting to learn malayalam.

~*~

Today's been more uneventful. Spent a good deal of today playing computer. till its scary.. but my brother's not at home, and its so quiet without him. even though with him its relatively quiet these days with him burying his head in his relentless mugging.

Okay i think its enough. let me just go and enjoy today - statistics hv shown that i've been a lot more happy than average over the past 10 months; smthg i do wish to continue. duh, everybody longs to be happy. except those self-sadistic pple out there who jus find that being miserable is fun. yes, i'm quite sure they exist; perhaps i was once like that. hahaha..

And also, as of 7jun, i'm abt a quarter way thru NS. more than a quarter in fact. soon. 513 to go...

Out.

Kallang Whimper

As i stare around the National Stadium, even with all its seats empty, i can feel a whiff of the aura that perhaps once surrounded those players who once donned the national colour playing here.. suddenly i imagine myself as one of those players; thousands of pple cheering, the stadium red, as a wave, the Kallang Wave, goes around the stadium. And suddenly i appreciate, even without ever experiencing it either from the stands or the pitch, the Kallang Roar..

Even the whiff i experience is enough to let me forget the blazing sun overhead, the barking parade RSM, the in-an-extremely-vulgar-mood ISM (institute sergeant major), and the general feeling of dissent throughout the SI students.

But i'm glad i am able to stand in the middle of the Kallang Stadium in all its (local) grandeur before it is torn down.

*~*

I think they're taking their own sweet time dismissing us. They are leading us around the Nat'l Stadium like they're wondering how to keep us occupied. All the aura of first being in the middle of the Nat'l Stadium has worn off, and now i'm just dying to get on the bus and get back home. Where's the Bus??

Ahh.. finally.. AirCon!!! and the blazing heat has had its negative effect on us. i think all the chinese are sunburnt. i'm just burnt. no, charred. but at least i'm not made into sum of my friends - there shoulders are white, their forearms, red. White and Red. The contrast is REALLY evident.. me, on the other hand, light brown and dark brown; not so evident..

Need to get sunblock. We had earlier told the bus driver on the journey to the stadium that he's allowed to go slowly on the trip TO the stadium, but on the return trip there'll be no allowance for that. And he's complying..

And its a great time to sleep; and dream of karaoke later in the day, and probably missing my 7am mass the next day. Where i will sing n sing n sing n yay.. maybe i'll sing josh groban and try to do the best i can. maybe i'll sing to make sum1 cry too.. but i think for reasons different from if they cry to josh groban's rendition of "you raise me up".

maybe i'll miss england's 6-0 demolition of jamaica.. (in a mystical voice) yes, i see the future.. muahahaah.. riiightt.

ok out.

AirForce - Above All

X-men fever runs riot now.. i've begun (as when jedi fever hit a couple of months back) to imagine myself with superpowers - thats normal, it nvr hurts to dream. i think.. Today they allowed us a night's out (which is why i'm back home on a friday night). The catch is, of course, that we hv to book in before 0730, which is quite taxing on the Singapore Transportation system as they hv to run early in the morning.. hmm..

so the drivers hv to go to work early, and thus they leave their spouses earlier, so we hv less kids, and so we'll hv the case of an ageing population which means that there will be less productivity and hence there will be economic slowdown, and eventually our neighbouring countries wld become economically stronger than us and hence the SAF will begin to get worried and hence further economic failings and then we'll all DIE!!! (takes a deep breath...)

Ok.

i think i'l book in tonight. which would mean very very soon. grrr... at least a little while at home la. i think keira is coming home soon, but i'm not sure when.. and that 10-sec phone call didnt help.. which is really why an indian can nvr survive in japan. its a culture shock.

i've realised that i'm not so bored this week - there's always smthg to do.. watching chinese ch8 serials etc. i think it slightly beats ultimate boredom. thank God for subtitles.. but still i think eventually it gets lame and boring - if u watch enough of it. then there's chess, chinese chess, etc.. and of course an attempt to learn a new language. and its fearsome how bunkbest can learn languages (i.e. malay language) at the speed he jus picked it up.

Nvm. i hv 30days.

and i'm getting quite fed up of telling pple that Malayalam is a language. cos it is.

and singapore idol fever is trying to hit the pple.. i think abt 37.2 degrees of fever.. but still i can say that already we hv more talent being showcased in this initial 7 pple than the whole lot last season. i think lah.. i think the mop-head rocks..

in the words of my sister, "twohill for president".

Anw i think my Singapore Idle platoon had to put up a wayang today as we were checked by higher authorities.. hai.. so we had to wake up and even switch of the TV!! argh.. but anw i can't wait to get out of this platoon and into tengah air base.. (if that's where i'm going..) at least then i can hv saturdays. and a normal life, at least.. and perhaps pple wld be more disciplined. hm.. i guess its not discipline in question, but self-discipline - discipline without authority. i acknowledge some of army policies are idiotic and jus blody well for show, but at least basic hygienic discipline...

oh well.. waiting for saturday to be over. and waiting for 19 june.

i am so tempted to make another day-counter to the 19th of june. but i think it takes up a fair bit of space. anw i'm so glad i'll be through with the army cum 1906. and yes. i am THROUGH WITH THE ARMY CUM 19 JUN.

gg airforce mah.. =)

out.

(i wonder how commands are given in america.. definitely no ke-belakang pusing's etc..)
[and fredriech forsyth is a damn cool writer.. man...]

X3

i spent the day trying to figure out how i can combat boredom in camp. i figured the fundemental problem with camp. n camp tv - no disney ch, no espn, no nickelodeon.. argh.. now i realise how dependant i am on these channels.. esp since ch5 decided against showing nice programmes..

apart from that i also watched x3. it was nice, but i was like.. NOOO half the time.. or "that didnt happen in Evolution did it?"... its a wonder how many different storylines can be created from a single set of characters.. tonight i'm booking in; the same routine of grey's anatomy plus sleep.. but i so wish i could go to changi airport tonight.. but i think its a biiit hard la.

hai..

hope i wont be too bored next few days. esp with keira (not her real name. i think.. =P) in japan n all.. oh well.. time for dinner.. ciao..

out.