Friday, July 22

The Missing Entity

Phantom, i was at school today. missed me? i doubt. haha... pays to be quiet.

But im so much more regenerated! that day of waking up at 9 did wonders. n guess what? tmr's another one of those days!! yipeee~..

n fish, if u read this, Where were u??? so upset!!!! heex... =P..

anw, doesnt matter.. much.. i'm not too perturbed. after all, its been such a great day!

n i finished mechanics 14. yep, which means, (since 15 is like sooo short, n i can do it soon), i've finished off all my mechanics tutorials by today~ yipeee! still hv to wrestle stats. tmr, ya.. n gg to meet naf tmr, after my GP remedial wid pops.. heex.. (my grandpa).

my sister's soo quiet nowadays. if onli everyday were a harry-potter-reading-day. ah what bliss.. the power of silence. tts wat that guy from GIC said - the power of silence.

when the teacher is talking. lets make it a GP teacher, so that its loads more believable. half the class is droning away. (the other half didnt even bother toshow up). and suddenly the teacher stops talking. n then the droning half suddenly gets woken up, n start to hv pretended to hear everything the teacher said. n all the teacher did was shut up. n we started to listen to what he was saying. proves one thing - give the students what they want (silence), and we'll give you what you want (attention). =P..

yep, students, stop hoping. n teachers, i'm kidding.

the power of silence.







yep.

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
kellyclarkson. behind these hazel eyes.
lovely song. yep. goodnight.
cheers~ ... n peace.

Thursday, July 21

IHATEGP

I'd longed to get my hands on tt book - HBP of course - for a long time... ever since carol msged me from down under arousing my curiousity. its scary man, de book - but great read. go read!

i wont deny tt the temptation has flickered past my mind to spoil the story for those who didnt read by blabbing abt it here. *grins mischieviously*. but i'm a nice guy. hurhur.. don read the next para if u dont want to whet your appetite.

to those who hv read it, i hv one burning thing to point out. yoda, gandalf, n aslan (though prob hardly any1 wld hv heard abt the latter). similar fates. yikes.. writers are always so sadistic. the disappointment is setting in. replacing the shock. but i'm already formulating what book 7 wld be abt. see la...

okay u can start reading now.

IHATEGENERALPAPERIHATEGENERALPAPERIHATEGENERALPAPERIHATEGENER
ALPAPERIHATEGENERALPAPER...

i scribbled that all over my GP common test paper. yep u guessed it - i screwed it up realli badly. well not as badly as i could have lar, but still very disappointing. i reli ought to try to think more maturely perhaps. think i aint that mature in thought. ya wat.. me still young; still 17!!

IHATEGENERALPAPERIHATEGENERALPAPERIHATEGENERALPAPER

N its been jus a very bad day today - loads of things gone wrong - jus a tad of felix whatever pls.. at least now got reminiscing on harry potter to distract me from ALL the things that went wrong this week. my mind's been turned completely upside down.

here i dont intend to boast, pls don interpret it thus. jealousy is a feeling i dont often feel. envy? perhaps rarely. but jealously, hardly ever. i mean, i've always been jus content with my life. but now... suddenly i'm getting jealous of pple - n i hate that feeling. its wrong. tts jus one of the problems la.

another is that i'm feeling jus so useless. kancy asked us to write whatever THINGS we hv done in our JC life. i thought. n thought. n thought. n reli theres nothing worth mentioning. n it jus makes me wonder if i've jus wasted away my whole two years here - might as well hv done the smart thing n leave the bloody system. wasted. no achievements, no nothing. pls don reprimand me for lamenting - you nvr noe a man's burden by sight alone.

i want to take a break from school. the self-declared 6-period break today isnt enough to replenish my mind to its usual sanity. i need to clarify things. mind-heart-body.

equilibrium imbalance; le chatelier's principle sets in

you go thru every week learning smthg new abt urself, else the week's not worth it. perhaps. anw, i jus realised i'm reli the sort who dissolves under tension. (a GP passage warned me not to use the word stress too loosely, hence i avoid it). i'm in such a state..

D-Day tmr. in this case, deliverance/doom doesnt matter. its both.

It’s a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Won’t you take me by the hand?
Take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are
But I, I’m with you,
I’m with you, mmm
-avril lavigne. i'm with you.

Monday, July 18

Ultimatum - Goodbye.

You're either in or you're out,
Please stop torturing me;
I'm already fed up,
I'm sorry.

Sunday, July 17

Sorrie

okay i'm back to normal again

thx mia n dia (yep, coincidence) for listening to me, n all da s'goon badminton pple n maan for distracting me. n most imptly thank God for healing me.

y'all deserve cookies, heex, if i can get hold of sum, tt is. anw, for those who dont noe wat caused me to lose normality, (if there's such a word), y'all neednt find out. its over, i shld think.

mi mom thinks ushnish de drove to mi house - apparently he looks old enough to. granted. she did get quite worried when she saw de big guy show up at the front gate n yell "hurry up la" impatiently. guess she must hv thought i'm messed up with some india mafia. not a nice thought.

anw, i spent mi whole afternoon asleep - n den a bit of studying - mechanics 12 was reli reli very easy. (sori, redundancy n repetitiveness. oops again...). now onto stats 13.1. 13's nvr a nice no. but then, i was born on the thirteenth. hurhur.. guess good things CAN come from that day then. =D.

minority report today - is it nice? wonder. onli one way to find out. finish my remaining work n watch the last bit. =(. yeahhhh..

i wanna change my blog template again, but then not reli no time, like keegan, ample time to like change his banner every other day hehex.. btw, keegan, the banner looks quite nice as it is. white's cool, but its not mi colour. duh.. (pardon the pun).

N once again, thanks all. n omg, sch's tmr.. boohoo.. adieu~

cheers~ n peace.

Saturday, July 16

Well, this is one of the few times my bad mood didnt go away after a goodnights rest. perhaps i'll pay for my stupidity which i call foresight. perhaps not.

see, i can never forget what yoda said in ep5 i think. "always in motion, the future is." unpredictable, yes.

well, perhaps we could question that statement. if you jump off the empire state bldg, we can easily tell your future. for the first few seconds, maybe minutes even, you will see nearing doom - the sidewalk. after that, perhaps you wld end up splattered upon the sidewalk. not a nice scene, definitely. wonder why pple still do it (jump). definitely to make a statement, as one of the reasons. i dunno. even if i ever got so far as thinking of it, jus the "foresight" of seeing my body splattered upon the sidewalk turns me off. there're cleaner ways to die. but i guess, no matter what, we still have to live as much as God wills us to. i mean, you dont turn back a gift to its giver right? tts rude. well why am i talking abt suicide? the truth?

i have no idea. jus random.

don worry, i hv no suicidal thoughts. yet. n i hv no intention of getting them. fullstop.

okay, badminton was fun, esp the last few minutes, cos thats the time when mi previously hard smash returned to me. u can tell when your smash is hard when you hear its sound resonating thru the hall. a beautiful sound.

but no matter, i still aint going for badminton tmr. mi mind is reli not where it shld, or could, be. its busy worrying abt disasters it itself predicts.

tts prob the problem with mi mind - always busy worrying abt disasters it itself predicts.

eg playing chess? the guy moves a pawn up and i'm panicking "y da hell did he do that? is he like hatching up some master scheme to down me? omgomgomg..." well perhaps its an exaggeration la. but anw, in case you need/want to noe, a pawn in chinese chess can be quite dangerous. yea.

but i digress once again.

coming back home (gobs n i) we had a great time, together wid my siblings, bullying shaWiza via phone.. she wont see this, i'm sure, so i don mind going on. hehex...

nah, later i'll feel evil again. anw its abt a sec2 class photo. heex. poor sha... wid frens like this who needs enemies eh...
okay..

cheers~ n peace.

off mi chest.

finally it works. for so long i tried to get into blogger, but failed.

oh pardon this, it might get a bit personal now - what?? i'm human too okay - but i shall try to keep my ranting as short and erm.. sweet. anything but.

bcos sumhow things not gg according to how they could go. yeah, yeah, i tell myself it can be worse.. but tt line reli soon loses its healing properties. if sumbody told you i'm over interest in certain others, sumbody lied. i'm still human, though i'm probably in a fac where u might think otherwise, granted. but reli - why dream? why chase a fading shadow? why try to find the end of a rainbow? why try to scoop water out of a sinking ship?

Hope. a driving force of motivation for some, a retarding force for others.
Hope. keeps some alive, keeps others better off dead.

somehow, perhaps what i wish for will come true. mind-heart dilemma. rmb. i've been classified, rightly in my opinion, as a level-headed, practical, and an oh-so-unromantic person. destiny has to be fulfilled. carved out of stone, yes. but fulfilled in the end.

you know, to give up hope (in this case) is so much easier - for my mind, my heart, everything. lost cause. go. and be happy. i shan't stop you. do as you please.

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

back! yeah pardon, tt was my clone talking. hehex. my depressed clone. but don matter him. he just needed to get some stuff off his chest. ali G is in the house! got the cd. but somehow watching at home doesnt have the oomph... of watching wid frenz. pity. wow, i'm sleepy now. i think i'm gona bed.

cheers~ n peace.

Wednesday, July 13

Coolness Redefined

I learnt a few things today.

- Jz's a genius. haha.. don worry, he thinks so too.

- okay more imptly,

I've finally learnt the joys of not caring who's watching you and how pple think of you. its a pleasant feeling - smthg like a carefree feeling. u neednt worry abt whu u hang out with, who you talk to and who u dont, what you do and where you do it etc.

cos today i had such a great time with some pple others (n perhaps me prior to today) wld classify as 'uncool'. pple who judge others by what others say abt them, are merely fools, n i was one of them for some time. i shld go with my own heart, not others hearts - to form my own impressions, rather than have them presented to others.

okay whatever, simply put, i had a great time playing the "singapore town" with tony n howe li, while they sang along. yes, them. n howe li's got a great voice. respect. but it was reli reli reli fun. cos for once, i didnt even care two hoots whether pple were like giving me funny looks or what. it was cool.

okay another thing i learnt today - when u play badminton with pple not as good as you, dont give chance. maybe a bit, but don yaya. realised tt when i played with some reli reli good players, who were reli reli too good for me, n when they played seriously, it was jus much more fun. haha..

another thing - benjy is such a COOL name. apart from another way of writing it, tt i cant say here, there's another COOL thing. Ben G.
  • (a) u can interpret it as Beng? well not chinese, so rule tt out. hurhur..
  • or (2) smthg like Ali G - Ben G. woooo.. now tts cool. Ben G in da house~ haha...
okay last thing i learnt today - don't blog before homework.

oops.

bye... cheers~ n peace.

Monday, July 11

ShORt PoSt

I'm only here to point out four random things.

- The great Yang of Chinese Taipei was knocked out by a british indian. i think.
(This is at the world pool championships 2005)

- The only player i know to hold a better record against the great Lin Dan is Pullela Gopichand. believe that.
(They're both badminton players)

- England's first single's name is Aamir Ghaffar.

- I'm indian
(i'm ME. duh.)

heex

I have no idea why i'm rambling. mental illness called schoolophrenia is getting to me.
bah.
eeee.. hai

okay cheers, n peace.

Saturday, July 9

Eggs-in-ham (Exam) Furore

Before i get into greater detail, let me jus apologise for the serious blandness of the background. The fundemental purpose of a background is to allow the reader to view the content, and i think this serves the purpose better than the previous, even if the previous was prettier. hehex.. anw, i'll change it when i can. probably soon. once i get over the euphoria of finishing the exams and before i get rushed into the hectic panic that is prelim preparation. by my calculations, that yields two possible times - next week, or after a-levels. hehex..

But mid years i can say are officially over, and its back to sch and lessons and all those things that temporarily paused for 5 weeks. and i say they're officially over cos all the papers have been marked and returned and checked. and we see that yth has finally got his coveted 4A*s which for so long has eluded him - even if barely. MC:FM:PH:CH=100:96:91:91. go figure.

well back to us humans. We had a much more troubling time getting thru the papers. my maths C was not above 90. bleh.. i noe some pple out there might think perhaps i'm asking too much, but perhaps when ur competitive like me, plus ur in an f-maths class where whoever actually does their work does score reasonably well, and if they're not careless, wld score 90+. i'm not sure if this statistic is exaggerated. maybe it is, maybe not. but its smthg along that line. i mean, yth got his 100 unflinchingly - without even the slightest change of emotion. man... anw, i'm happy with my mark anw. A is A la...

overall i think my f-maths was the MOST delightful. it got returned to us in parts- section C (statistics) was returned first. and i reli screwed that up - 21/39. pass, but soo far from A. and i had reli worked hard for f-maths over the hols. much harder than usual, at least. so duh, i'm pissed. if u can rmb, it was the bstrd qns - questioning both Geometric and Exponential in the same papers, smthg teachers said oughtn't happen i think. anw, so i screwed that up. and my total score for sections A and B faced a bleak ultimatum to score 49/61 in order for A. imagine my euphoria when they surpassed that ultimatum. thank God.

physics was disappointing - a real wake up call. somehow i always thought of myself as quite good at physics. i think so did mr kwek. so imagine our shock when i saw a 6 as the first digit on my score. the good news; it was 69.7. barely an A. and in the end, i found a mistake in the marking, tt made it 70.3. but i reli need to work harder if i ever want to smell a distinction in s paper physics. even to smell it.

which is why i dedicated this week to studying physics. phyllis my darling. hehe.. brings back memories, hurhur.. =).

other 'darlings' are jus useless larhz. but tts a story not for here. haha...

pray complacency is nvr felt by me. let yth n roshni be my motivations. neednt beat them. jus that they are assurances that excellence is possible.

cheerios~ n peace.

Sunday, July 3

boredstiff.

yeah, tt i am. my whole family went to watch the aviva open - excluding me. why? bcos i couldnt wake up early this morning n so had to go for church in the evening. in any case, indon resurgence. indonesia took the men's singles n doubles; while china took everything else. hur hur. anyway, taufik hidayat was fantastic - he's edged out peter gade, beat lin dan, n in my opinion demolished chen hong. and tts great to add to anybody's resume. dreams...

haha... anw after my long absence from the game, to come back and partner coachleonard may not hv been the wisest thing to do. but tts wat i did lar. stupidly. i kept playing like a toot and he kept getting frustrated. n at one stage i jus felt like throwing my racquet away n retiring from the spot, surprisingly prematurely of course.

onli one thing stopped me from doing that.

the fact i had prepaid admission into standard bp for 5 months. looks like its gg to be a long five months. anw, i'm definitely hanging up my racquet after that, at least temporarily. i dont think i can bear playing badminton for NS. yucks... absolutely detestable. i think even standing in the hot sun baking myself is a better option.

on that topic, NS reli seems much closer from this side of the medical check up. hehex... hope jus the positive aspects wld tell - they say it catalyses the maturing process. hopefully. right now, i think i'm still immature. but hey, i like it that way.

another thing tt seems really a whole load closer from this side of the june erm.. break-from-sch is the A levels. and if i say i'm cool and unfazed by that, i'd be beyond lying. mid year tested like onli on average 75% of all stuff, n studying that 75% was a reli reli horrible experience. and i still didnt get all of it studied. physics electricity and modern physics seem ominous, n i havent even mentioned further maths. urgh... at least chem seems understandable. maybe its bcos u dont reli see it when u lose marks in chem, ya? maths in physics its blatantly obvious when u cant even do the sum for the lack of a formula in your head. (eg. negative exponential distribution formula).

but well, perhaps there's still time. now must reli conc. on s-papers. now, THAT'S scary. physics esp. maths c not reli. but physics. yeah...

so u wonder why the title is "boredstiff."? cos tts wat i am. i've got no mood to study. yeah. still in holiday mood from the end of midyears. i guess i reli hv to knock myself out of that mood. ahh but soon lar. not yet. n tts y i'm blogging. hidaho. haha..

okay i'm hungry. byzies..

cheerios~ n peace.

Saturday, July 2

Aviva Open

I discovered ownership of aviva open tickets early this morning, when i was greeted to an sms from matthew informing me of it. not willing to waste money, i promptly pounced upon the tics, n the opportunity to watch the games.

onli two i reli wanted to watch - wijaya/budiarto vs. eriksen/l.hansen & taufik vs. the lieutenant. both were classic matches in the end. indonesians having a very fine day by winning them both. n perhaps its something to do with the crowd being amazingly pro-indon.

wow~ indon fans outnumbered (at least outcheered) china fans.

n yeah, don laugh here. incidently i was among the china fans supporting for lin dan. but tts bcos i've always admired his play, which perhaps wasnt reli apparent today. or perhaps its bcos taufik in his day can practically beat anyone. yep. in his day.

its a different question if it will be his day against the admiral (chen hong). hope he is. n let indonesia prevail~ hur hur..

anw i've always been a fan of chandra wijaya n whoever his partner was - be it tony gunawan or sigit budiarto. but now i think budiarto is a very entertaining player. he was keeping the crowd well entertained which his death-defying defence. tts the accurate word. death defying. i guess the great big danes must have been getting really frustrated when the mighty steep usually-killer smashes kept getting returned back with interest. amazing match, worthy of a final, in my opinion. act the lindan-taufik semi was also worth a final.

anw, this result actually is great for the finals - an all danish affair in the men's doubles affair perhaps wld not be as enticing as an indon-danish affair, which promises much, judging from today's indon-danish affair. similarly, an all chinese affair betw, lieutenant and admiral, wld not be as exciting as another indon-chinese affair. like today.

problem today: super jammed up all the way. kallang was jammed up bcos of the NDP preview or smthg, n s'goon gdn way was jammed up too bcos of chomp chomp. poor cabbie. he was soo tired. he even sleeping behind the wheel. n was commenting on the great jams all over the roads.

okay anw tmr have church n badminton early in the morning~ so...

cheerios~ n peace.

New Template at last

And its my first ever template i designed, so don laugh. constructive criticism is welcome, together with instructions how to correct. hahaha.. and this marks the end of my break from studying.

Mid years on the whole were fine. all papers save maths were killer papers (in my opinion), so yeah.. nthg spectacular. N i went for NS med check up today. soo long.. can cry one.. bad luck, cos every tom dick n harry who didnt have exams on today happened to find themselves at CMPB. and i stayed there for six hours.

yes. six whole non-stop hours. hai...

oh wells... wat has to be done, has to be done. its so late, so i aint gonna talk on more..

cheerios~ n peace.

Wednesday, June 29

Out of Breath

I'm standing at the finishing line, and i'm suddenly out of breath. Just one more day. but i cant study no more. aint nothing entering my head, and thankfully, (or rather hopefully) nothing leaving it either.

I've already taken four out of five papers, two were a breeze, if i say so myself, n the other two were designed to massacre. GP was surprisingly easy, and i thought perhaps a B is possible - until i heard rumours going around that kancy is marking my papers. And i thought i heard the apocalypse coming.. man... he gives as much marks upon 50 as most wld upon 40. hai.. goodbye B. but maths c was easy. and the objectivity of it makes it such that i dont think teachers out there wld be out to murder me.. oh well...

Anw, that was, apparently the GOOD news. F-maths, (duh), was hell. designed for a massacre of innocents, it got me thinking so hard that not only my head hurt, but my neck and shoulders too. too much hunching - 3hrs straight of battling evil mechanics (SHM) and statistics (exponential dist) and pure maths questions. Our good hero (me) was left with nothing left of his usually vast energy supply by the end of it. no capacity to study.

And then came physics. normally, its quite easy. at least not so difficult till i crane my neck continuously over my work with occasional nervous glances at the LT clock. Fear.

I just hope this fear is unjustified. Really. but i think i'm not easily satisfied. sadly.

But one good thing abt physics - smthg abt wavelength of light came out. then they asked wat is slightly below 400nm. *gives a smug look*. and who says it pays not to have a blog? hur hur hur...
~.~

i spent the whole today studying (n watching a little TV) wid gobi at home. productive? tmr we'll see. did much, but whether that much sticks in my head is a different matter. i vow, that after the mid years, i'm gg to cheong my subs again. n not do last minute revision. for tt doesnt help much - it doesnt sink it. anw, i hope my mind is awake and cheerie when i take tmr's paper. and i shld get back to what i shld be doing now - sleeping.

wow, n tmr's thursday~ amazing how time flies when ur chasing it.

cheers~ n peace.

Sunday, June 26

Eulogy

In memory of June Holidays 2005.

IT was a good holiday. with many fun stuff done. it started out with a whole week of preparation for ICS Nite '05, culminating in a great sense of achievement for all those involved. ICS Nite Verdict - Success, i say. then came the chalet, and i delayed work once again.

Then came smthg completely unexpected. Illness. and so i delayed work again. three weeks gone without studying. so, as for being a studying holiday, no can do. but well.. it was a good holiday. let's raise our glasses, n a minute of silence, in memory of June 2005.

*funeral march*

n now look forward to what she's given birth to - mid year exams. eurgh...
and good luck pple. to each n every student ill-fated to be faced with that prospect, good luck.

cheerios~

Friday, June 24

Four A's

I'd like to dedicate this post to the memory of getting 4A's for promos, now resigning myself to the fact that a repeat is plainly impossible. so i'm waiting to pick up a couple of D's, C's and maybe if possible an A. and we havent even mentioned failing GP. i.e. below 45%.

What enticing prospects...

Worst part is i jus aint got no mood to pick up a book and start studying. the couch (new one) feels soo sleepable, and so does my bed, and so does practically everywhere. and watching TV is always much more interesting than reading my stupid file. browsing through stuff i've already known for more than a year. i think i'll go to sleep early and wake up bright (dark) and early tmr...

~.~
My room is clean.
All tidied up.
Thank
Heaven.

but enough of maths la.. i think chem is in more dire need. chem, and physics - electricity. Tmr i'll do the physics. today is chem day, after all. not tt i did any. so... here's to achieving the unachievable. here's to passing my mid years.
cheers~ n peace.

Thursday, June 23

Well well well...

Boo!

Yes, its me. i know, i shld be studying, as are most other of my peers. but i'm fed up, n i hv generally resigned to the fact that i aint gonna score full marks, so why bother studying, when u going to be making mistakes anw right? anw, its been AGES since i've come close to full marks.. perhaps last time was in primary school, and man, that seems like ages ago. but well, i'd better hope i get A's, or should i? maybe i can screw up this exam, cos i reli xian to study more.... then prelim i will score well! yayness!

pah...

lemme crap on anw, remorselessly casually throwing my revision time away. anyway i did do a fair bit of work, 2 f-maths papers, brain-drain enough. (i know tts not the appropriate term for it, but yeah, u get the idea)

they say u can nvr work your brain TOO hard.

i beg to differ.

cheong too much, means sleep too little, sleep too little means not enough rest (as well as not enough exercise), means susceptible to illness, i.e. you CAN work your brain too much.

~.~
now let me ponder aloud smthg. is it right to say: "since its june, on average, half the pple my age are 18 yrs old"?

I'd hv thought so, but apparently its wrong. half the people my COHORT perhaps, are 18. not my age. english, schmenglish...
though i doubt there's a flaw in the statistical estimate.

~.~

I nvr knew stats could be soo hard until i tried my f-maths paper. yucks... you maths C pple reli dont know wat ur missing, so don get jealous of us if u think we onli study 3 subjects. pah..

maths C stats is hard too, after all... sheesh.. all english perhaps... useless language. no, i take it back. there are other languages more - i wont use the word - tt makes english a great language. But GP still sucks... yucks... eurgh.. n to think my beloved GP falls on the first day of school. well, might as well punctuate a horrid day - the first day of school - with a horrid event - GP exam. at least there's maths C to look forward too. at 2pm, while i wld be drowsy and tipsy and giddy and dizzy and basically tired n sleepy. yawnnn~

They reli know how to exhaust your mental stamina man. i'm drained now... i wonder how im gonna survive for the test. or for a levels. or for prelims. or for life. man...

they say man plays for the first 20 yrs of his life, n works like a cow for the rest of it.. man... i think my 20yrs are coming to an abrupt end, unless i migrate to greener pastures. literally. i think shepherding is non-intellectually-challenging.

maybe it is... if it is, i'm sure shepherd's assistant is non-intellectually-challenging anyhow.. unless there's a job for professional sleeper or smthg like that. pay me to sleep. droolz...

Cheerios~

Monday, June 20

Dawn of Reckoning

Suddenly.
Three weeks have passed, left one to go.
One week to complete three more subjects.
Please.

yes. Stop.

i ought to stop panicking, before i start frolicking at the mouth, or gooey stuff starts getting excreted, and other disgusting stuff starts to happen. or i might very well hyperventilate. after all, they TELL me i'm a highly TENSE person. not cool. but i think i kool. i like panicked situations, cos while everybody else is running about, searching for mars or smthg, i can retain my level-headedness. its fun, anyway.

anw, the cause of panic, abovestated, is no fun. while in other countries, students return from these 'summer holidays' rednecked and sunburnt, in steamy singapore, while we are baked every other day, holidays are the time when we are most often cooped up indoors, preferably under airconditioning. doing what? Studying, of course..

unless u are like me. who was down sick for one week. why do my holidays always have to be a sacrifice to illness. jeopardizing my mid-year marks, i tell u.

anw, progress report: i've finished stats. mechanics, will be completed soon. once i'm offline. then the papers will be completed tmr. add oil...

cheers~

Tuesday, June 14

Stats Wars

Its nearly over. i'm at the last chapter of stats. but the problem is, i still hv pure maths n mechanics left. puremaths, not reli much to study la, mostly yr1 work. but mechanics... har har.. different story.i think i going to slp very late tonight. or maybe not.

Anw, tmr, 15 june, in school, anybody wanna play badminton? jus sms me. or whatever.

its so difficult to organise this sorta stuff, i mean, everyone has their own commitments, n will gleefully accept the proposition - but wait, they wld then hv smthg on tt day, n then wldnt be able to make it. bleah... onli marcus has interest unbound. haha.. expected though. so i now call those with interest bound. if there is no clashing of interests,... but then, i donno if u guys tt interested in badminton? haha.. doesnt matter..

i think the park-soccer-guys have now transfigured themselves to become the park-skaters. so much so tt the way it transpired last evening, i spent the evening playing soccer wid pple half my size. take not, this is NOT the way i prefer. no insult to anurak or timothy, they'll grow up to be quite good players - they can do stuff with the ball i could onli hv dreamed of at their age. well maybe not. hehex i could 'rainbow backflip' at pri4. muahahahaha...

soccer's fun and all. sum kinda game where u put ur body on the line, n well, its comparable to stuff like extreme sports in some ways. well except for the frequency of injuries. badminton? u injure urself due to vigorous activity more than anything, u dont have to wait for pple to come n slide u or take ur knee to places its nvr been (i.e. bending ur legs into shapes its not supposed to be). a racquet to the head can cause concussion, but so can a boot to the face.

n ultimately the point of the whole entry goes back to work. i mean, tts wat most jc2 pple's life revolves round - work. sadly, i reckon, we are facing the cultural erosion of a rich tradition - the slacker tradition. hai... *shakes head sadly* oh well...

i wonder how good my bahasa meh-lah-you is now.. biarkan saya tulis hanya satu perenggan (i still cant pronounce tt word) dalam bahasa melayu. entah mengapa saya tiba-tiba terpesona dengan bahasa melayu. haha.. mungkin saya rinduimu, melayu. yucks... puuui!! puui!!..

ah whatever, one day i vow to make a completely melayu entry! its soo difficult right now. all the words seems lost up in some corner in my brain. typical of malay, sitting in a korner... HAHAHA.. jus kidding.

okay peace~

Sunday, June 12

Liberation

Feels so good. i'm liberated. of all the things of this material world. matter, some stuff do not. so now i'm listening to music n chatting, relaxing, when ironically, i should be hard at work with my stats file n stats book in front of me. Stats Wars.

but well, i'll start it later i guess, now im resting. i did manage to clean up my room,

the pause was for congratulations, yeah, here!

okay thanks~, i'm proud of myself too.

and today i'm happy. and not because i can finally start my work. its bcos i hv learnt (or rather relearnt) to place my trust not in material things. i mean, sumday, God will sort out everything. i jus hv to help him, perhaps, my doing work now, or later, rather.

but i'm glad. i've been freed from this figurative bondage.

okay, today i played badminton for the first time in about 3 weeks. its probably the longest i've gone starved of badminton since the forced absence tt exams instigate, such as the o'levels. but well, apart from playing like a complete nook at first, i mean, seriously, we got thrashed by a couple of old men. but i'll attribute tt to lack of speed and a couple of mistakes on my part, n reckless smashing on terry's. but tts the way we were taught.

which brings me to an article in today's today. abt how sporting prodigies die out rapidly. perhaps tts wats happening? i wont die out. i'll relearn my stuff, if tts wat it takes. but rmb, onli recreational. i've hung up my competitive racquet. in more ways than u might imagine. haha.. okay, enough.

Peace~

Thursday, June 9

I'm so fed up with myself. irritating. fickle-minded. foolhardy. but mainly fickle-minded. but sumhow im so sure of this. (wait, that line is soo familiar) yeah. a dangerous game, i'm playing. but sumhow, they say go with ur feelings (heart), n yeah. i noe wat tts telling me to do. but me? i'm prone to trusting my head above my heart.

next problem. sumbody might be getting hurt bcos of me. or mayb not. whatever it is, factually, its better to hurt early than late, if eventually hurt will come.

so good, no more problems.

see la

jus came back from chalet. quite tired, but nowadays not very used to sleeping early. so tts y im still up here so late. plus im waiting for my camera battery to charge. though i doubt tt wld be ready too soon.

one interesting discussion. weird names. some guy named john named his son Johns Son. pronounced that way. (not johnson) nowadays, ignorance goes unchecked, n civilisation is modified.

ignorance is the prime mover of civilisation, perhaps? very possibly. yar today i'll jus make this a very short entry lah. n the battery is still charging. so i'll jus end here, n probably update when things are sorted out. n mind u, i will sort things out. tts the way i, ben.p, work.

cheers/``/

Saturday, June 4

ICS Nite

Today (or rather, yesterday) was ICS nite. so its all finally over, n i can finally go study now. i didnt screw up in the dances, well not too bad at least, thank God. (i did make one mistake, but tts bcos i lost my footing, and was completely blind to wat was going on arnd me.)

I think as expected Faisal and his Black Five were reli the main highlights. little irony. chitra n her company of pretty girls would hv a say in that too, cos im sure there was a great section in the crowd fascinated with them. i used 'fascinated' bcos its the cleanest, most innocent, word i can use for this situation. i mean, if i use other words, sumbody gonna get a-hurt really bad... i.e. this blog entry might well then be the last one of mine.

anw, onto the more normal dances. i.e. mine. it went smoothly enough. very well in fact. Tum se milke was damn fun la.. esp with the crowd yelling n cat-calling salman's name. some pple are popular. others are normal. still others are like me, unknown my more than 85% of the sch.

But im not complaining actually. i dont care two hoots how many pple noe me, cos duh, i don wanna noe every1. i jus need to noe the nicer pple, n i think i already do, to a large extent. anw, andss pple sumhow noe me, even now. maybe bcos i used to actively go back to my alma mater, being a good n loyal alumnus. haha...

random point: do you noe that alumnus onli refers to males? alumna is for females. alumni is plural, unless it refers to onli female graduates, in which case its alumnae. interesting? ok whatever.

anw back to ics nite. shyam was great. the two dramas were great. tho perhaps a critiscism wld be tt the first is way too idealistic n unreal, n the second, bit copycat. but putting that aside, the actors played their parts well, n the show, from where i watched it, was great.

overall great job la. indians can do it too.. im onli not writing soo much cos im soo tired. n well, i'd reli like to thank those who came to watch me la, even be it for a very short while esp marie, chunmin, shariza, jingzhi, ruebini, n everyone else whom might not hv known i was dancing but anw came... n also to those whom circumstances prevented but im sure they wld hv loved to come, i.e. terence n keegan... hahah...

okay so begins the onslaught on the enemy "MYES". the battle would not be easy, n serious preparation is vital. so probably i might not be coming online as often as i had been these past few days. MYES. i.e. mid year exams.

personally i think the MYES are coming at a very good time. Life's gettin abit mundane u noe.. probably these few days, socialising with a few pple, getting to noe them better, it was quite fun. but now, back to erm... boredom? loneliness? solitude? see la. soon things will improve, jus all we need is belief...

yeah okay, its super late, abt 2 am. so g'nite world.

cheerios/``/

Tuesday, May 31

Psycho Indians, Dances & Tests...

Dancing. now i hv a new dance to dance to. very brief, but tts because its at a frantic pace. but i think i can do it. onli worry now is tt i don panic when shoved centre-stage. can already feel the panic growing in me.

~compliance got me here.
~arrogance kept me here.
~sheer willpower will get me out of here.


up-down-ultraman
up-down-netplay
up-down-peeling apples

This is an example of stuff we use to rmb the steps. but each up n each down is 1 beat each. so imagine that la..

i think the names the guys come up with to rmb the moves are fantastic(ally funny). come to papa... n everyone can associate with it. come to papa... i think it'll be fantastic to watch the whole dance. but dances are all like that. the true beauty comes from a 3rd person's point of view. (if tt 3rd person is not hornily staring, captivated, enthralled, at one particular person in the group, that is). but tts jus a side comment - no implications on any real situations. hehex...

N the advertisement on TV now is abt "unmanageable hair". what coincidence.

probably half the world (more likely abt 6billion of the world) wld prob not understand tt coincidence, but unmanageable hair is a direct reference to chitra. (for the benefit of the 5.999... pple who still dont noe who chitra is,.. good for u) hahahaha... [duh she's some girl who's a damn pro dancer] [n unmanageable hair.] okay this is getting spastic. drop the subject.

i came across some guy who wrote sum nonsense on a white board. he could spell celibacy n some other fantastic word which i oso donno, but he couldnt spell anoynomous. (for the benefit of those pentium 1-3 series out there, actual spelling is anonymous)

i mean. anoynomous is probably a word i'd use to describe my brother when he's talking to me abt badminton when im trying to study. anoynomous is also probably i would use when Luis Garcia loses the ball in midfield for the tenth time in as many minutes in a game against West Brom, or Southampton for that matter. THAT is annoying.

Also, convienence. no comment. (read above, my comment would be similar)

i'm not saying im faultless, definitely if u cant find any mistake in this blog, be them grammatical errors, or speling errors, i'd slap myself. note that in the previous statement, i have already taken measures to spare my face from the humiliation of the self-inflicted wager-slap. boo-hoo...

Theres this one comedian, an indian guy, russel peters, or smthg to that like. super funny. couldnt stop laughing. as gobi says, "confirm go to hell one". (karthik looked really spastic laughing at it, cos he was listening to the guy through earphones, so it seemed that he was jus randomly laughing to himself. jus picture it.)

Anw, pple often listen to those who 'confirm go to hell one.' its human nature.
Disclaimer: im not saying all leaders will go to hell..

perhaps its like smthg like tt stoopid psychometric test today. 4 blardy hours, n i m finally thankful its over. no matter wat i score. the maths part was freaky fast, n it was more comprehension that maths. i mean, no algebra, no trigo, no stats, no mechanics. no wonder us FM pupils found it tough. (boring to be more precise).

n duh, we FM pupils couldnt do the verbal part, to a large extent. no need to say. actually to be honest, i completed the verbal section with like 4 min to spare, but well, it was tough, so i oughtnt be pleased with myself for that. half the things are soooo like between [cant tell] and [no] . sheesh. why they hv to make it so hard i'd nvr noe. i mean, we're not THAT smart.

on this subject, i don understand the reason for having exams so tough. to find the top students? we already KNOW who's the top student(s). the teachers already KNOW who their top students are. no names mentioned. perhaps onli reason is to challenge pple. bah... no comment.

reconsidering... okay maybe one comment. shld jus let those who lurve the challenge, challenge themselves. heex..
okay i think im jus writing on nonsense. duh no sch wld ever accept this method of examination. its not erm... democratic. or rather meritocratic, if there's such a word. else i coin it.
so lets jus be happy with what we have. hee haa jolly well haa..

okay tired. tmr got dance practice again. its a once-in-a-lifetime thing. so i'd better be happy abt it. heex.. okay aufwiedersehen~

cheerios/``/

Sunday, May 29

Sunday Pi

Today is Sunday. i have to keep reminding myself that, cos i keep forgetting. after all, it feels like a monday. perhaps because yesterday felt like a sunday. n tt wld be because saturday felt like a friday. because friday was a half day. yeah, tt we all noe.

Anw, for a sunday, it was an odd sunday. no badminton in the morning. and i think if i count the number of times the word 'badminton' appears in my blog, i'd really shock myself. honestly. got too much badminton, complain. got no badminton, oso complain. qi-lah-kah...

hahaha.. mr goh is funny anw. but he's a nice guy, contrary to popular folklore. from his f-l-c-k services, to his clown-idiot duality. now i'd kinda miss it larhz..


~.~
so i slept in today. really in. like up to 10.15 am (compared to 6.30am on normal sundays). but i was supposed to spend an additional 1 hr in church. but i didnt... woopsie..

I was supposed to do tonnes of work today. i.e. the whole of statistics revision. yup, u guessed it right. i didnt do it. but i did do some GP essay.. completed it at least, so its good enough. but now later tonite must cheong maths again.. haaha.. but must do my exercise too. though i think i'm very likely to hang up my racquet, somehow badminton energy has disappeared.

now i noe where my excess mass came from. "E=mc2". true. u gain mass, u jus lose energy to do work or exercise. einsteins mass-energy relation in practice.. Hahaha!


~.~
In any case, i hv practices for ics dances soon. goodness knows when though. anw tmr i hv sch, n i suspect that the practice wld be tmr. so i'll msg those in charge whom i noe the no. of, n ask. otherwise, perhaps they jus donno my no. and lazy to find out. sheesh, its onli 20,000,000 possiblities right? maybe a bit less. i donno if a no. can comprise too many 9's... in strategic locations that is...
no dont interpret that wrongly, not bothering to hantam-buta 20 million numbers is wise, not inconsiderate..

i think the upcoming week is soo busy man. lessons in sch, psycho tests, cheers open support (always count on a victorian to be cheering), n of course ics nite. leavign jus thursday open. n we havent even included ics dance practices in that schedule. looks like a fascinating week coming up.

~.~
OHHH so much maths homework! Really a Sundae P

cheerios/``/

Friday, May 27

Showdowns. And Slowdowns.

VJ finally got its second title - hockey girls - but i think greater applaud goes out to the hockey guys. A div finals for guys hockey was the most exciting match i've ever seen. recently, at least. but ultimately rj were the better team - i mean on paper its quite impressive: 2 nat'ls, 5 combined sch's, rest club players. whu reli could ask for more?

But its fantastic to watch the game, n fantastic atmosphere, with all the cheering, even after they scored the 2nd goal tt by right sealed our fate. anw, great game.


Onto another Great Game. I bet most readers might already hv guessed what game i am referring to. frankly i didnt actually catch the game, but well, the scoreline (and goal-times) make it sound like probably the greatest finals since ManUtd's famous victory against Bayern Munchen abt 5 yrs ago. Well surely u have alredi guessed wat im talking abt...

Liverpool Are The New Champions of Europe!

Underdogs, unseeded. shows that anything is possible. n nvr to lose hope. even if ur 3-0 down at half-time against a famously impregnable defence of legendary players.

There always can be miracles. When u believe.

Anw the feeling was an uplifting one, n after the low of wednesday's defeat at the hands of Meridian JC, i was feeling high bcos of the champions' league final. and the hockey finals. oh wells.

N i still went for MJ choir. but it rocked. Congrats MJ choir! (and TKSS choir). AND of course, Marie! hahaha... great performance.. ;)


Special AnNouncement!

I'm dancing for ICS night. i think. so guys, appeal to u! come watch me!!!! hahahahaz~ I mean, have u EVER seen me dance before? especially an INDIAN dance? hahaha... gotta be fascinating. i'll do my best n try not to screw up hor...

(for tickets jus tag me, i'll try to let u noe.. tic prices are going for a very affordable price of ONLY eight dollars and zero cents. 8.00 only. Checks, Credit Cards, Nets payment not accepted.)


~.~

I jus saw some AndSS publicity thing. i think they shld call in some i-comp pple from vj to help them next time, cos i donno if it'll hv the pulling capacity. but listening to the background music (the andss school song) n watching the videos do bring me on a little ride down memory lane.
more accurately Memory St 53.

And i thought it was quite amusing - esp the part where they featured the andss badminton team (complete with its 6 shuttles per training, with altogether 4 teams, and 2-3 courts) and the caption was "with the right equipment, and best facilities." Irony. (Fe)y.

In any case, advertisments, no matter for what purpose, or what mode, rarely tell whole truths. they rarely tell whole lies either, cos duh, tt will get them into deep sh- erm... trouble. Children might be reading this.


TAlking abt reading - i'm finally reading my first fiction book of 2005. probably more accurately its first fictional book since mid-2004, but no one need noe that.

The Teenage Workbook, by Adrian Lim. Great read. though honestly i think the prequel, the Teenage TEXTbook, is marginally better.

i've worked up a training schedule for myself. soon, u'd see marine parade winning the inter-con, thanks to a "certain-point" doubles pair? heex.. dreamz... maybe i could even don nat'l colours, but perhaps thats reli hoping too far. but one thing i can realistically hope for is -

probably a body I, for one, can be proud of.

which, knowing me, even if i had, i wld conceal from view. hahaha....

oh and i forgot fitness. NAPFA 30pts. coming soon. muahahaah... SAFSA team, coming soon. yeah right...

ANd i hv to mug super hard. sumhow i'm determined on the much hoped for - perfect score. not exactly 100% in everything kinda perfect score. more like the 4As, 2 distincition, A1 for GP kinda perfect score. If liverpool can win the Champions' League, i can score that score.

Wait liverpool DID win the Champions' League right? *pinch me...*

but anw, Cheers to VJ. Cheers to Liverpool.




When you walk through a storm hold your head up high
And don't be afraid of the dark.
At the end of a storm is a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of a lark.
Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Tho' your dreams be tossed and blown.

Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart
And you'll never walk alone,
You'll never, ever walk alone.

Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart
And you'll never walk alone,
You'll never, ever walk alone.

Wednesday, May 25

Finals

Its coincidence when two finals in which u have vested interests occur on the same day. 'A' division soccer finals, as well as Champions' League Finals. Is it an omen that VJ lost? :'(. so sad..

If Liverpool lose, i really probably wont even feel like getting out of bed. If Liverpool win, perhaps there is truth to the saying that every cloud has a silver lining...

Hai..

Good luck liverpool. Good luck me.

cant talk abt the soccer final. too upsetting.

Why, VJ?

Tuesday, May 24

HecTic Day

Title says enough.. i actually wanted to watch "revenge of the sith" today. Instead i watched "revenge of the sloth". sorta.. fell asleep in the library. knocked-out-cold. so ultimately missed out on the opportunity to watch that star wars episode III. well, i still wait in earnest. perhaps tmr is a sunshinier day.

ms wong let us off early today. very early. so i met sum1 whu nvr shares a break with us. quite a shocker, but, well, think abt this.

Assuming X has an affinity for Y. but $ no interval : X u Y " t. Then X u Y cannot exist. oh well....

procastination is a powerful inhibitor to work. duh. n im overwhelmed by the spirit of procastination. why?
  1. Holidays coming soon
  2. Can study during holidays. (yeah right...)
  3. Can sense the coming of half days and/or full days.
  4. So can teachers.
  5. The onli two normal tutorials today were not really serious, i think.
  6. GP is not normal, and its not a tutorial. cos the defn of tutorial is where we learn, not where we sleep.
  7. Backlash was on monday, so i slept at 2am, and im still tired.
  8. The prospect of work is demoralising.
  9. Physics syllabus is complete.
  10. Ten reasons are good enough an explanation

so due the the joyous spirit of procastination, here i am, bloggin my life away.

on that note, i think i hvnt made a clear impact in VJ. question of course, is if there is a reason to? leave a mark on VJ, not similar to the ball-mark i left at st gabs...

~innocent eyes~

What are the stuff legends are made of?

I'm always torn between two minds - one to show all my cards, accolades, stuff that could impress; n the other to hide those very things till someone chances upon them by themselves. but i doubt i need hide these stuff from my closest friends? or myself for that matter. that last statement, by the way, suggests i actually forget a lot of stuff i might hv achieved. weird... anw, i always look to the future, n i think tts the best policy. no point dwelling in the past unless u hv a way of making that stay.

I've learnt smthg abt myself. i.e. the way i study. its so erm... mathematically rhythmic. i jus subconsciously formulate patterns that have to be followed, n then use these patterns to reformulate new patterns, n thus hv an artillery of patterns that can be applied to solving problems. which would explain why i cant learn too many languages at the same time.

i do hv a tendency of mixing these patterns.
in maths its okay,
in language, i neednt say.
its great with music though,
it creates a natural flow.

i hate lit.

okay i ought to go already.

~May the Force be with You.~

Grandmaster Mace Windoo

Monday, May 23

Worked Up

Well, its been an eventful few days.. cos its been a long weekend. with loads of concerts to go for. namely aj co n band on sunday, and vj harmonica on saturday, so its been a weekend without much rest honestly.

until i napped away this afternoon, that is.

but workwise, its piling. namely statistics. stastically speaking, on the average, im behind in two different subjects, ahead in one (not anymore though) and barely making it in the other. loads of work to do. n i thought i had three days to do it. methinks that time has been slightly shortened now. by a factor of around 24. 3 hrs.

maybe im exaggerating. perhaps its a factor of 12, to 6hrs, which wld be perhaps the time to i slp. but of course, each minute i sit here blogging, that factor just rises. yup still rising.

oh anw, i don feel like doing anthg now honestly. mb i'll get the inspiration soon. i can after all, call up inspiration if i reli need it. though its sort of wasting my 'force energy'. hahaha...

im watching episode III on wednesday. or tuesday. today wanted to go, but i think a little too ex. i mean, nowadays its reli not worth gg to cinema and watching movies... wonder how rising ticket prices will hinder movie piracy. like MnO2 hinders hydrogen peroxide's decomposition.

a little chemistry goes a long way...
everybody noes that.
~.~
The 16PF report is confidential. otherwise i'd hv loads more to blog about.
But its okay for MY report rite? haha.. i think it was pretty accurate. n i always knew 90% of the things. i think the stuff i scored highest in, theyre quite negative. eg. apprehension, tension.
i.e. im a nervous wreck.
u think so?
i think so. whu noes, i might end up a dumber version of john nash.
i doubt.
but tt doesnt mean that i still wont end up schizo like him. =D. haha...
they showed "A BEAUTIFUL MIND" on sunday. too bad i didnt catch it. watching sum china opera music. no comment.
but i still admire those guys. i cld nvr play as well as that. so congrats chunmin n jz! great job. esp jz and his onstage antics.
for those who didnt buy tics from him, too bad. i shant elaborate.
FA Cup Finals.
For those who dont know, Arsenal won the FA Cup. or rather Jens Lehmann did. so much as i despise Man Utd, i can feel a note of compassion for its supporters. they deserved to win. My dad's always willed to call ManUtd undeserving, but unfortunately nvr got to. So the FA Cup final is an eye-opener.
ManUtd are Undeserving, Losers.
haha... i've always wanted to call ManUtd losers too..
Of course i wldnt say tt if ManUtd had lost to my Liverpool in the final. In tt case, it wld be tt Liverpool had managed to hold ManUtd at bay, n den performed when it mattered. haha..
Anw, talking abt Liverpool, Champions League Final soon. Liverpool v. ACMilan. exciting.
Okay now time to go study. Really late. i think the jus-now-the-mentioned factor is now 24. its already 9pm. dratz...
P.S. i hvnt been blogging all this time, i was reading abt the pilot pen cup this year. quite n interesting read.
okay ciaoz...

Friday, May 20

Seduction by the Dark Side

This is not a scenario peculiar to anakin skywalker. in my opinion it applies to many of us. let me explain.

Firstly let me point out that the Star Wars series has many more lessons and meanings and connections to the real world that it cares to reveal. the other connections, i shall not refer to here, or else perhaps there would be to omuch to blog here.

After all, i hvnt blogged in ageees. n so much stuff to write.

anw, as i was saying:
i think the "good" or "right" thing to do ALWAYS seems boring. there often is this tendency to LIKE to do the "wrong" thing. i liken this to anakin's addiction to the darkside. n jus as he continued to be glad abusing the power, n being a dark jedi, most of us continue to do the wrong thing, because its fun, n seems much more fullfilling.

But, as ani found out in the end, pls cover ur ears, whuever hasnt watched episode VI, or rather skip this paragraph...

- ani discovered finally that the good side alway IS, after all, more fullfilling. n aptly threw sum idiot down the chute.

anw, the pt is, sooner or later, we shld relise that wat seems fullfilling often is not. n vice-versa.

weird perception? haha.. okay. whatever...

anw, finally today i got to play soccer, yayness. cos season over ma.. n now its a long weekend, so can rest... n i scored quite a no. of goals, n scoring goals is a nice feeling. bah, jus now had so much to say... soon write again la.. haa ciaozz..

Friday, May 13

Friday 13th

Normally im superstitious, honestly. but this friday 13 wasnt too bad. in fact, it was quite a good friday the 13th.

random point: we started mechanics chapter 13 today.

anw, more on todays events later. cos i hvnt blogged in a week, n it seems so much longer than that, cos there seems to have been so many things happening this week.

well for one, it was tournament week, n vj crashed out at the expense of CJC. well, not unexpected lar, but disappointing. probably more disappointing for MJ though, cos even though they got the pleasure of thrashing us 5-0 afterwards, we dragged them out with us. n they've got a good team.

anw, i played singles against mj. n rumour has it the guy i played with actually slightly frightened quite a good player before me. so not much shame. i dont think i can ask for more, except for the honour of not being given under-5 in both sets (it was 15-4, 15-4) but okay lar.
note: i havent played a singles match in competition since sec 1. n then it was pretty much play play one.

on a brighter note, im free from badminton commitments already, and im ready to embrace it as a game rather than a sport. willingly.

today i realised that if i go on a scholarship, i hv no control over what i become in my future, even though i probably hv control over what company i would work for, or what course i'll take in Uni. meaning, i could study engineering for 5 years, onli to undertake a profession that doesnt have ANYTHING to do with engineering.

having second thoughts abt even trying for a scholarship.

oh i got interesting programmes on my com already, can design websites! namely gps website. if colin djpang doesnt manage to complete his, i mean.

missed a lot of lessons this past few weeks. must catch up.

okay so finally on to today!
AndSS had a holiday today because of various achievements. congrats to all andersonians. so that left my fave niece joy joy bored at home. haha... so i made the poor girl come all the way down to parkway parade (sorry!) and jalan-jalan. walk-walk. not to mention eat, duh. i skipped half of physics S, cos well,
  • a) i couldnt understand anythg
  • b) i was too tired and lazy to understand anythg
  • c) hadnt really planned to even attend the lecture.

anw i went till 3pm. so more than half of the lecture.

i made joyjoy a bad girl. brought her to a POOL place. haha... classic. well, everyone has to hv that experience, rite? den went all the way back to bishan, where i was engulfed by the omnipresent Rafflesian atmosphere. smthg like that victorian atmosphere you might experience in Marine Parade, or Parkway for that matter.

Anw i had fun throwing cynical glances at innocent passing-by rafflesians, jus for fun of it. of course they didnt see la. i guess seeing rafflesians is a rarity, esp since i chose not to go to that sch, (altho its now 10mins away from home, drats).

Its friendly rivalry i guess, nothing more. and i saw a few scholar-friends of joy's. u might hv thought i hv had enough of scholars, being in a typical scholar class, but m'sian scholars
(except YTH) count as singaporeans. haha... anywayz joy went out with one of them, jingzhi (not ngiam) n lived happily ever after. as far as i noe la. haha...

Overall Friday 13th turned out to be quite fun. n its even more pleasant knowing that well.

I can sleep in Tomorrow!!!!

no badminton u see. haha... n no pe. haha...

Saturday, May 7

Badminton. and MORE Badminton. And a little soccer & basketball too.

It was a reli amusing training today. i spent longer time playing basketball n soccer n running arnd in the basketball court than i did playing badminton. and all this during the badminton training itself. well at least its some way of spending my time, instead of sleeping on the floor or stage, or staring blankly into space, or watching pple play (already saturated with what i can already learn from them...)

But seriously, for the sake of VJ, im glad lar.. its more impt the 'key' players are trained. n even more impt that they perform, especially since we share the worst luck among the four schools that are below RJ in our group.

Meridian, Catholic, HwaChong and Victoria.

Common? in the sense tt we're all below RJ in that group. definitely by right MJ is the strongest. But they lost to CJ. its reli scary when the so-termed 3rd place team (MJ) can fight to 2-3 with RJ.

And even HCI, despite being prolly the bottom in the group, (after they lost to VJ so unluckily), prolly will qualify for the quarters if they had had the slight bit of luck NOT to be drawn in our group. i.e. by my seeding at least, schs tt shld be seeded 1,4,5,6,7 form one group. luck of the draw i guess...

or severe lack of it.

Anw, we beat HCI by the narrowest of margins, tho perhaps it shld hv been wider. we lost 2 matches we shld hv won, and won 1 we shld hv lost. odd. tt reli nvr happened back in andss. but then, i think it was a tad less competitive.

enough abt badminton lar. my tournament n involvement in badminton, at least for this year, is quite likely to end soon.
tho i hope not...

okay i thik i shld sleep already

tmr got badminton (fun) early on.. heex

ciaoz~~

Saturday, April 30

Finally

I'm back here blogging again.
Why did i miss last week?
  • (a) I met up with friends more often than not and got to talk alot such that didnt hv much to blog about.
  • (b) Com was down.

Haha... okay anw...

Yesterday was VJC sports day, lest you guys dont know yet. and yes, again i subject myself to that self-realisation of my inferiority in some aspects. well, yeah. i cant run, i cant dance, i cant cheer, etc... so yeah its normally quite a time-wasting, life-shortening, frustration-building experience. and it kinda started out that way.

Anw, i was nicely dozing off in the top tier, row Z, as some may call it, when some peggie house caps came to chase me off the stands and onto the track. why? for some 20x100 "NOVELTY" relay. they couldnt find enough pple apparently.

OF course i was reluctant. i mean. novelty relay nvr meant u were any good. in fact last year i could hv thanked the pe dept for not "allowing" me to run cos i was a college rep. anw, this year i had no such luck. no stipulations barring me from participating. unless of course i had run in any previous individual event. duh no.

but out of loyalty to my Purple Pegasus Army, i joined the race. well, not too bad lar. for a novelty race, there were a no. of trackers n relatively known runners among the runners. so i didnt feel that mediocre. haha.

mediocrity is the villain.

Anw, i got the baton n cheong as fast as i can, so much so i think perhaps some feared my legs might break at any time. i doubt. badminton player noe? hahahaha... i wouldnt noe lar, but apparently i gained ground on opponents.. woohoo, though i still wld attribute the 2nd place finish (yup u heard rite! wooohooo!) to some runners among they guys and also the girls, prob stacy n florence from wat i heard from the stands. congrats pple!

n for my 15-16s participation in that race, i got a medal! yay! another novelty medal to add to my growing collection. but this one's sweet lar, cos its prolly the last i'd ever get.

~.~

okay, i've given up badminton. conc on perhaps what im reli good at i guess- maths. bleh, or i hv to subject myself to the knowledge that i'll be rooted in mediocrity as far as badminton is concerned for the rest of my life. not that i hate the sport. its still one of my greatest loves. but mr wong apparently "doubts" im vj-badminton-team std. *%^&. last two weeks lar. i'll cheer on. no doubt. i guess perhaps, enthusiasm is all im good for.
one final challenge set by colin, one final defeat for me. monday. my final game in 'competitive' badminton.

~.~

I relise smthg. no way i miss andss. i jus miss the pple there - the students and most of the teachers. u guys are probably the best pple i've met. then there's vj pple. this is a generalisation, it doesnt apply to EVERYBODY. But its so difficult to make friends in vj cos so many pple are so two-faced man. n im already fed up of quite a no. of pple. prolly i'll start avoiding them. its better for my heart.

prolly if u were to try to guess who im trying to avoid, u wld get it wrong. cos i don mind pple who r perpetually bstrds. unless of course they're overdose it. or dose it disrespectfully. but in any case, i think i end up preferring some pple that most wld shun.

pple who r perpetually idiots are easier to understand. pple who are always good are rare. n most of them i think by now r my good friends.. =D. n they're, unless im mistaken the majority of pple who read this blog. haha... hii u guys!!!!

so bye to u other guys. dont take it too hard. loads'a other pple still like u. i hope. haha...

Anw, away from this subject.

i doubt i hurt any1, cos i think i've a fairly good idea of who comes here. even if u dont tag me. heex...

muahahaha do i hv that air of omniscience? hahahaha... joking..

n oh my goodness gracious being. i hv horrendously gathered a horrible mess in my room. my books. yikes.. full of nonsense. must clear up. n soon. cos i hv a frightening load of work for this labour day weekend.

  • Mechanics - 7,8,9
  • Statistics - 8,9
  • Analysis - Appn Int.
  • Chem - N-compounds, Polymers
  • Physics - AC

Scary? i think so. cheong ah. got more energy. cos nvr go training. muahaha... okay.. gttg liao..

U-V rays. l = ??? haha..

Sunday, April 17

Neverland

Peterpan's one, not MJ's; although the general concept is the same. So we all grow up. That's inevitable. And i guess over the past few days i hv "grown up". Some sort of sudden dawn of reckoning as i was lying on my bed a few nights ago. no. last night. or maybe this morning. whichever.

If truth be told, i think i really would prefer not to grow up, because its adding a lot of burden of responsibilities etc. u don't get excused for ur mistakes that easily, its not all fun and carefree. I guess thats idealism, and no one has an ideal life, unless its one completely with the Lord. well, i'd admit, thats a very happy life. and i guess i used to have it, no worries n such. but i gave it up subconsciously. n im gg to find it back. Yupz...

I've been too self-absorbed, n overly concerned with things of this world, when idealistically, nthg in this world is really joy-giving.

I'm not preaching here la, lest u might get that idea. im jus calling it as i see it. Trying to analyse why i keep becoming so miserable nowadays, when in the past i was practically so much less so. In any case i think i'm the wrong person to ask about Christianity on that high level, due to my inadequacies at self expression. I know a few articulate people with this forte. If so happens any1 might be interested lar...

Though i doubt pple wld want to give up the materialistic world we live in.

Its so weird, but self torture is quite an enjoyable experience. Paradox of life on earth i think. haha...

okay... smthg else, which i shared in another blog, but well here goes again.

Self-Pity

is a constrictor of potential. It stops us from reaching a goal that we can set, and tt we might achieve. Because we seek refuge in self pity. Its in some senses a form of escapism to say that "we can't do it, bcos we're jus unable to". But tt's not true is it?

For example in the 3rd set of a badminton game, its easier to claim we're tired, n sumhow it seems like a valid reason to 'sorta' throw the game. Me? i'm mentally weak. (tt in itself is a demonstration of how mentally weak i am. Self-pity) But here let me try to make amends. I'll try to be stronger lar...

n yayness my spa n pw r over.

so on to a lighter 'topic'

But damn am i sooo behind my tutorials. i think. maybe. there's maths stats 6,7 and mechanics 7.2 (the latter being vomit-blood standard). n i hvnt even mentioned the upcoming prospect of the Geometric Distribution which has been said to be very very very hard. ah heck.. take it in my stride lar...

Okay, any1 wanna go out n study some day? cos its so difficult to study at home lor.. in the end i think im going to hv to do all my hw in sch before i go home every night. sowmya lend me ur house if they kick me out of sch.. hahahaha... jkjk...

den go home n happy happy sleep immediately. n im not exaggerating.

Badminton. ah jus play lar. bit tired of it in my opinion. sian. i wanna learn sum new sport le..

okay lar, my hw is beckoning. so ciao~!

~ultravioletlight~

Sunday, April 10

wahhhhh

now i feel like trying out a new blog design.. so i'll try lar...

today rush to finish writing, but since my vow was to write every week, so erm... see how much i can write lar..

still hungry. ate lunch too early today. cos i was bored. now dinner time... n waiting for the rest of the familie..

okay anw...

this past week has been ermmmm okay on the whole... in a studying sense, the word is "atrocious" though, cos i think i hvnt reli studied enough. i've spent my free time more so playing/ watching TV/ watching liverpool lose. ok la good enough

okay finished. times up. bye!

Thursday, March 31

SPA

ignorant folk out there, this means school-base practical assessment (i think) n its not fun at all. tmr i got spa. capacitance discharging, or so i hear... i think that much is disclosed... sadly, im quite afraid of this assessment. here's why.

Last time i tried doing an electical experiment, it went completely awefully amazingly wrong... for some reason, the voltmeter, n the current charges, seem to hv acquired lives n minds of their own, not to mention free will. exactly. they acquired free will. the free will not to flow. n the circuit was correct. weird. current charges are weird.
But at the end of the experiment suddenly they decided to come to life. anw, its better for those living thinking current charges to decide to oppose my direction during the practice session than during the real spa rite... so jus hopefully nthg bad goes wrong tmr.. X-es fingers...

Anyway i m sick today.. bleahh... so i was leaking from nose (n mouth) thru-out todays lessons. used one whole tissue packet plus a few other pieces. unfortunately, due to reasons previously defined i HAVE to go to school tmr. don want!!!! oh wellz.. sianz...

The physics lecturer lost his cool today, n just stopped teaching. jus let us copy the slides. and i didnt, cos i too, sorta lost my cool at his actions. but understandable, once i consider the scenario. in any case he lost his temper whilst i was not in the lt. i was washing my leaking face in the toilet at that time. anw alternatives always exist. just takes an opportunist to find them.

~~~~~~~

tmr april fools day. happy april fools. don get fooled too much lahz..

~~~~~~~
I dont want to go to school tomorrow.
I want Chocolate. think Muffins. Muahaha...
n karthik stole meghna's muffin. n madhu took one more than her share.
Muffins drive pple to a life of crime.
poor meghna. with an opportunistic sister.
i want Muffins. n Brownies. n Cookies.
~~~~~~~
ooh cuteness...
the onli way i'll get over one, is to fall for another.
~Out of the Tiger's reach, into the Crocodile's mouth~
A word to reignite the flame
in some senses applicable
Fortunately that word wont come
Thankfully
okay tt was my random thoughts of the hour...
bEnP~

Saturday, March 26

Declaration
of independence?

sorta. independence from badminton. officially: i'm super-xian wid badminton already, n suddenly im beginning to feel like im joining that wave of (better) andersonians who hv given up on badminton with VJ as a staplehood of life. namely ruyan n lau, the more pragmatic pple. me? a more (ironically) "romantic" view towards badminton - as a fun sport

no doubt it is. depending on whu u play with, n how la.

i mean, i doubt that game was played with much graciousness, which is why i think i'm not too happy at the fact of being involved with the game lar.. bh man...

oh n i think i was on court moving abt for 1hr (less than that), n watching pple play badminton cum lying down on my back for abt 3hrs... cant wait for season to be over, den i can finally be rid of all this nonsense...

anw im feeling much better... chatting with jen.. n im freeeeeee! dotzies...

i'll go back to my original stance abt badminton. i'll jus play when im asked to, but i shant waste away my saturday mornins, im going to do smthg fruitful instead of stoning for 3hrs.. i'll decide on wat fruitful thing i should do later...

today is holy saturday. n tmr is easter.

the New Light is coming.

n oso this weekend is a long weekend. so it feels like sunday already. except no church. yar... okaay..

over n out! =P

P.S. shld ur wife be ur best friend? thought for the day...

Sunday, March 20

A thousand and one

A thousand and one reasons to curse today. Ranging from the fact that there exists school tomorrow, to the fact that blogger home page was in CHINESEEE!!!! for crying out loud. hmm in a normal state of mind tt aint gonna irritate or annoy me, but well, there exists school tmr.
Making one misconception clear - i dont enjoy school. especially lessons. friends are a good counterweight. but then theres msn. n outings with friends without the lessons. so well, school is not irreplacable is it? my vision of a utopian society is one where there's no school.

obviously this vision is somewhat similar to the Trunchbull's vision of the perfect school - without children (Matilda, Roald Dahl) - impractical n ridiculous. so why school? to get smarter. to get a better job. to get more $money$. to apparently land more pleasures and joy.

here i dont make the clear distinction between pleasure n joy. shall refrain from preaching. in any case, u hv to work to survive in this world. n if ur like me, n would put under "fave pastime" the word 'sleeping', good luck to u. tt being sad. good luck to me.

so lets jus try to face school knowing that prospects are just going to carry on getting worse and worse. i mean - each day that passes, we get closer to our a levels. so in anyway of lookin at it, yesterday is always better than today. odd perspectives.

YET.

There are a thousand and one reasons to celebrate. Each day that draws nearer we draw nearer to the happy times of life to come. perhaps seeing our grandchildren, perhaps seeing our Maker. N we complete another day of our fragile existence. and blessed one, for it always can get worse. so i shall count my blessing for today. obviously not reaching till a thousand and one.

  1. i'm practically rid of any strong feelings for any particular person. i'll drink to that.
  2. i'm free of the chains of any bounding.
  3. i had a wonderful trip in bangkok. well it was a mad rush, but that adds to the adrenalin rush...
  4. i'm alive n so are all my loved ones.
  5. i've got wonderful friends. and enemies perhaps. still thankful for them too...
  6. there IS a liverpool game today against everton. we are going to win! so i put it down here. in any case if they lose, they lose tomorrow since the game ends tmr morning. so its not reli a blessing for today rite?
  7. i'm going in utterly unprepared for lessons tmr. (how's tt a blessing? somehow it feels like a liberation, leading to point no.2. the full ouch will be felt tmr.)
  8. i'm completely unprepared for the chem test on tuesday. nope. i am prepared. prepared to fail. i'm completely prepared to make my chem teacher happy n fail. after all i think i'd deserve it. especially in her eyes.
  9. i've got no PE tmr, unlike some unlucky blokes. sneers* haha..
  10. n yet i still can barely do 3 pull ups on average. right back at me eh?
  11. oOo a full football team of happy thoughts! capped off with the most wonderful happy thought of all. My God Loves Me!

So here comes that above-mentioned preaching of the difference between pleasure and joy. joy lasts. pleasure is intense, but doesnt last. which is better? ask yourself. the pleasure of a fling, or the joy of friends =P...

BOTH! of course
HAHAHA kidding~

Singing/Signing off today, VeryCrazy(inthai) @ blogspot.com.

~bEnP~

Tuesday, March 15

Going ^-^ UP. downwards.

yayness the holidays are here true n true. n i spent my first day of hols... yeah go on, guess - PLAYING - surprise surprise... oughtn't hv been the case? no. cos today is day of resting. n tmr is day-to-go-out-wid-old-frens. yupz... looking forward.

anyway looking backwards... i think i just blogged yesterday... which is quite uncommon for me. i mean. twice in two days? ok.. nvm off the topic. im blogging now cos theres no one online. not surprisingly - look at the time. LATERR... yeah... n i think i needed to talk to somebody this afternoon.. by "somebody" here i mean "anybody", not "some particular person".

though i'd hv settled for that too...
Anyway... the point being, i was lying in my bed in the afternoon, quite tired but cant get to sleep cos i'd be thinking abt some stuff... stuff i think i'd reli be better off forgetting.

Not as serious as one might think. more like..

  • 3pronged attack not working as a distraction
  • nonchalance not working either
  • n onli at certain times...

could be disasteeeeerous. (deliberate spelling error)

i'd get it off my chest before i get married. or engaged for that matter. just see how it unravels -o__ - before it gets halted in it tracks... o or o_______ _ _ to infinity. dreamz... o_o...

wide-eyed wonder.

i thought a communication blockade wld guide me on the right track. but guess not.. mental blockade too... anw tt reminiscence is probably the reason why im bloggin tonite... maybe i'd be fortunate n 'the madness of my com' wld decide not to publish this post... i donno why im saying that.. yeah... needed some means of expression. playin piano jus not working today...

why the blockade? why the fear of telling? bcos its nvr worked out perhaps? or bcos this is probably the onli time i'd ever thought it was right... i hv no idea. n i need that confirmation. i need it, but im afraid of getting it.

i mean, signs point towards -ve answer. n i think this time wld probably be worse than the other times... wld it be possible tt it wld be mutual? hmmm.. not likely, knowing me.

i aint good enough? bleah.. i'd rather be thinking that way actually..

hmm im gingerly treading ground so as to conceal identity. last person in the last possible place on earth.. sadd... maybe a good nights rest wld make me forget. otherwise goodness knows how i'd be able to concentrate on work when i hv to do it..

i've talked abt 7-9 paras abt what most (all probably) would find incomprehensible... sorry abt that.. needed to let smthgs out..

anyway today i watched three movies! - cinderella story, star wars episode V, and Shark Tale. coolios.. it was my day of rest after all... n i caught the trailer for episode III.. looks sooo cool.. hope the good guys win that battle though...

must get back in shape. n study.

oh n we going bangkok on thurs. way cool.. shopping trip. no time to visit old friends. awww... in all seriousness.. mb next time when we hv a longer break. n if i pass my napfa. so tt means must work harder on my arm n shoulder strength.. yeah.. n smashing power. vj-dynamyt.

yeah whatever.

mug GP. do tutorials. eeek tutorials. but good thing - i don seem to hv any school over the hols. which is cool. *boasts* (while chucklin' at the poor souls who hv to go to sch). but i got laughed at back by pammy. "school finishes in a month" n now is study break...

droolz...

must write letter to pple overseas. make a note. carol, jen, keegan. soon. i'm jus not good at keeping those kind of promises. sorry pple! porous memory. n procastination gene. those of u studying medicine/ bio-engineering help me isolate that gene... thx! ok kidding.. i jus absolutely do NOT condone bio-engineering. well except maybe in some very special cases. (keegan u are last cos u called me the other day) yeahh... i'd reli ought to stop doing that yeahh? yeahh.

tmr k? tmr is friends-day. my declaration. whichever of u 3 read this tell me k? i'd wanna noe whu actually reads my blog... whu does anyway??? hmmm... Shudder to find out...

okay time for my fave section: Random Verses
today's random verses comes from a song i like a lot - Vanessa Carlton's A Thousand Miles

It's always times like these
When I think of you
And I wonder if you ever think of me

'Cause everything's so wrong
And I don't belong
Living in your precious memory

'Cause I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder

If I could fall into the sky
Do you think time would pass me by?
'Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles
If I could just see you... tonight
And I I
Don't wanna let you know
I I
Drown in your memory
I I
Don't wanna let this go
I I
Don't

okay that's it from me, bEnP on verycrazy(in thai).blogspot.com... see you on my next rendition of yesterday, today. (if u made sense of that past sentence, tell me too. but if u didnt, ur about the same as me. poor you)

bidding
you
adieu~

benjamin tm

Sunday, March 13

Moving on...

damn i jus typed sooo long the other day n then suddenly the whole system went 'kaputt'.. oh wells.. not my luck...

ok first things first: All-England Update
  • Mens singles final between Chen Hong n Lin Dan both of China. n i support Lin Dan (count the no. of times "winner" appears on his accomplishment-list) but he lost.. bleh jus my luck. my jinx. next time pple if u want to win dont ask me to support u k?
    I think i'm a jinx.
  • men's doubles between china goodness-knows-wat-their-names-are and denmarks Rasmussen n Paaske. I like Rasmussen. buy my dad's supporting them. so im for china. for some reason. goodness-knows-wat-reason.

    oOo btw pple do you noe i hv Jonas Rasmussen's autograph!!! yeah...
  • womens game all china affair, no one actually watches that anymore... might as well call that even All China instead of All England.
  • oh but there's at least one english team this year - in the mixed doubles final. good home support at least.

yar for full details jus go to IBF website.

Anyway second thing's second.

What has happened this week.. hmm... ooh yeah keegan called from down under.. yeah.. haha aussie accent developing and all.. well.. yeah.. den there was this essay writing competition in NUS.. so i had to skip training... SAD lar... they gave us five topics. sounds good rite? but here's the catch - all five topics were all abt religion. sensitive issue. n me being me can have reli strong views regarding this topic. hope i was jus reasonably unbiased lar...

den after that i jus went to the open house at NUS too... was with sowmya (who was in the comptn with me) n marie n her friend... so yeah... den eat at mac(s)... blew a bomb. man. bk so much cheaper. 390 for a whole meal... look at all the monies!.. bleh...

all this time the whole family save colin was at m'sia, hving apparently the time of their life. well mb not. place buzzing with cedarians. cant be too pleasant? haha... rephrase: place buzzing with Girls. still not too pleasant. den today went down to sba to play badminton (i mean wat else DOES one to at SBA?)... there were ex-nationals. my honour to be there. i'd improve now. i hv room to improve. contrary to popular believe that i've reached my peak and too lousy by nature.

  • note to self: improve footwork.

Anw after that went amk study with wZine... stress when u cant do questions i noe... yeah.. all s paper. better start muggin s paper

Things to Mug

  • GP
  • Maths S
  • Everything else... damn...

yaddaya-yaddaya - then church - den go out awhile - den im here.

Hi.

=D

Wednesday, March 9

oOops!

Oh wells... I missed last weekend.. but i think it was soo hard weekend. i don't noe why.

Anyway.. i doubt anyone actually comes here, so to whomever it may concern, sorry for missing, tho i think i aint apologising to anyone.. oh wells..

OMG i failed my GP essay! and all because i mentioned a few good points of totalitarianism... bleah... so much for balance. and i was onli given 67% of the time to do it. sad case. n since all my supposed evaluation of my points were located in the latter para's that didnt come out due to the lack of time, yar, my whole essay lacked evaluation. AND i put in effort in that lar!

without effort i get 16/50
with effort i get 19/50.

i might as well not put in effort lar!!! blardy hell... *i feel reli shortchanged*

n he told me not to write politics! hmph... if i listen to him most of the time, this is where i stop! come on lar, its the onli gp topic worth doing. mass media is HIS fave topic, not mine... jus hv to read up more.

  • I vow to start mugging GP.

Well, there's kaleidoscope (n kaleidoscope online exclusively to me) n then theres research to be done on my pet topics. i'll show him! idiot. (its not in my character to insult teachers in this way mind u... but well, im not in a 'normal' state-of-mind.

OH n Mechanics is driving me up the wall. or well, off the wall. Impulses n Impacts. Oblique impacts...

~!~

"mv sin f = mu cos q ".

and the restitution rubbish. got headache. n the qn asks to prove to 0.185. n all i can get is 0.815! blardy hell. stuupid f maths mechanics.

u reli shld try catchin me at a better time

perhaps during the hols!

okie how to feel better after a blog: realise that well, there are onli TWO more school days left! (one and a half preferably), weeee... living on...

no. chugging on. dragging my feet as i walk slowly down to the corridor to the march hols.

random verse that comes to my head

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone